ELLIOTTCABLE changed the topic of #elliottcable to: a _better_ cult ˙ ͜ʟ˙ embrace, extend, extinguish.
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<devyn> joelteon: I dunno kinda
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<gq> -what
<purr> <micahjohnston> the question mark is a good character
<purr> <brr> is prophile a bot too
<gq> -what
<gq> -what
<purr> <micahjohnston> DALEKSGORDON: thought you should know
<gq> -what
<purr> <whitequark> plastic food is awesome.
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<ChrisKringle> soup fgss?
<gq> ChrisKringle: not much
<ChrisKringle> cool cool
<gq> most of these guys are from #oftn or somewhere
<ChrisKringle> oftn?
<gq> ChrisKringle: ELLIOTTCABLE introduced me to IRC in 2009 when we dated :P
<ChrisKringle> awh
<gq> ChrisKringle: mostly this chan is to work on a lang called Paws
<gq> the github links to look at it are somewhere
<gq> -paws
<purr> gq: what i see every time i poop
<gq> HAHAHAHAHAHA
* gq coughs laughing
<gq> fuck you purr you stupid bot
<gq> hahaha
* gq pets purr
* purr rrrrrr
<gq> ChrisKringle: purr is coded so as to be fairly competent fake A.I.
<ChrisKringle> oh, wow, that was an AI?
<gq> ChrisKringle: yep
<gq> -purr
* purr
<gq> -what
<purr> <elliottcable> that’s right, micahjohnston is currently riding Santa to texas.
<gq> ChrisKringle: -what is our generic "say something funny that got said in here once" cmd :)
<ChrisKringle> what kind of algorithm does it run?
<gq> ChrisKringle: good question, this is where i get shown up, i'm a simple script kiddie at best :P
<gq> SOMEONE HERE FUCKING WAKE UP AND TALK TO ChrisKringle GOD DAMMIT
<gq> joelteon-: dammit you're probably away
<gq> ChrisKringle: well joelteon-/otters are prolly your best bet
<gq> or ELLIOTTCABLE himself but he's...mercurial? lol
<purr> lol
<ChrisKringle> XD
<joelteon-> gq: ?
<ChrisKringle> <=friend of gq
<gq> joelteon-: ChrisKringle is a friend from another server, wants to know what algorithm purr runs on pls
<joelteon-> how am i supposed to know tht
<gq> LOL
joelteon- is now known as joelteon
<ELLIOTTCABLE> what
<gq> yeah see this is the oh thank god ELLIOTTCABLE talk to ChrisKringle please he wants to know about PAWS, and purr
<ELLIOTTCABLE> what the fuck is an ChrisKringle
<joelteon> santa
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: a m00tykins
<ELLIOTTCABLE> "10:54 PM <gq> most of these guys are from #oftn or somewhere"
<ELLIOTTCABLE> wat.
<gq> no he's too skinny to be santa
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: wat yourself idk where you picked up these fuckers
* ELLIOTTCABLE laughs
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: me you brought into the fold by dating but that can't be typical
<ELLIOTTCABLE> so I'm going vinyl-nuts
<gq> ...can it?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> gq: you'd be surpried.
* gq glances at user list
<gq> god i hope not
* ELLIOTTCABLE counts exes in the channel listing
<joelteon> your mom has vinyl nuts
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: get tash and nexxy to hang out here again
<ChrisKringle> ohhh... ELLIOTTCABLE... remember our fling in vegas?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> I love how you mention the two people in here whom I *haven't* banged
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: lol of course becuase they're married :P
ChrisKringle was kicked from #elliottcable by ELLIOTTCABLE [WE DO NOT SPEAK OF THAT]
<joelteon> you haven't banged me either
<ELLIOTTCABLE> joelteon: keep protesting <'3
<joelteon> don't pretend you have
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<ChrisKringle> lol
<gq> wb ChrisKringle
<ELLIOTTCABLE> anyway didn't mean to come in, just heard the stupid irccloud noise. bai.
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: PING
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: PING
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: PING MOTHERFUCKER NO YOU FUCKING TALK ABOUT PAWS
<gq> YOU'
<gq> RE LIKE OMG IT'S MY LIFE'S WORK
<gq> NOW YOUR'E FUCKING DITCHING TO GO FUCK A VINYL OR SOMETHING
<gq> D:
* gq kills ELLIOTTCABLE and buries his corpse in the backyard
<gq> >.<
<ELLIOTTCABLE> ‘fuck a vinyl’
<ELLIOTTCABLE> basically
<ChrisKringle> its ok, I got some pms to take care of, brb
<ELLIOTTCABLE> seriously, would have sex with.
* gq headdesk
<gq> purr: help me
<gq> purr: give me strength
<gq> BASED GOD PLEASE HELP ME NOT TO KILL ELLIOTTCABLE THEN /HIS/ FAMILY WOULD KILL ME AND BURY ME IN THE BACKYARD
<gq> D:
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: ooh
<ELLIOTTCABLE> studio ghibli; special-edition (beautiful.) sleeve artwork; mondotees print;
<joelteon> more like acidic god
<ELLIOTTCABLE> and, of course, fucking coloured vinyl.
<gq> naice
<gq> joelteon: moar like ovoids god
<gq> -ovoids
<ELLIOTTCABLE> no. stop.
<ChrisKringle> so, I'm back for a bit... is purr a markov bot?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> ChrisKringle: Paws is a VM for asynchronous languages.
<ChrisKringle> interesting
<ELLIOTTCABLE> purr ain't markov; he's a collection of sneaky tricks programmed in by different users with no regard for what he's already got going.
<ChrisKringle> lol
<purr> lol
<ELLIOTTCABLE> sorry to disappoint, no machine learning there; just four years of accumulated, and then forgotten, deterministic responses.
<ChrisKringle> so, basically alice then
<ELLIOTTCABLE> mmmmm not really
<ELLIOTTCABLE> the pleasure here is that not a single one of us really knows everything he does, so he catches everybody off-guard
<ChrisKringle> iirc alice was mostly deterministic
<ELLIOTTCABLE> I mean, durrr, could read the code,
<ELLIOTTCABLE> but that's *also* a horrible mess so it's nearly indecipherable :P
<ELLIOTTCABLE> that's the fun part.
<ChrisKringle> lol
<ELLIOTTCABLE> anyway.
<ChrisKringle> cool
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: wtf is ur github link? i want to show ChrisKringle paws in its current incarnation
<gq> so i can blow his mind as thoroughly as possible pls
<ELLIOTTCABLE> purr is boring, except the quickly-reaching-critical-mass ‘whats’ database
<ELLIOTTCABLE> paws is cool. ;)
<ChrisKringle> The thing is, VMs have gotten a bad name in my head b/c of java
<ELLIOTTCABLE> heh
<ChrisKringle> er, VM-based langs
<ELLIOTTCABLE> well, this is surprisingly similar in purpose/usage.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Java is *really* two different projects; the JVM, which is mean to support and lend power (in its' case, speed and stability) to an entire class of programming languages.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> the languages we in here would call Rut, or Oasis, languages.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> then there's a terrible language that originated that project. we don't speak of that.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Paws is similar in social theory to the JVM. The purposes are similar, anyway.
<ChrisKringle> ah, so really the JVM could be used to technically make even worse langs than java?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> It's an attempt to build a conceptual framework for asynchronous / CPS languages.
* ELLIOTTCABLE laughs uproariously
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Oh, it has. It absolutely has.
<gq> totally has
<ChrisKringle> XD please don't tell me...
<gq> the things i have SEEN
<gq> in this fucking chan
<gq> O_O;
<ELLIOTTCABLE> In fact, ‘quickly throw together your own programming-language on to of the JVM!’ is an entire class of articles, books, whatever. (With good reason.)
<ELLIOTTCABLE> but that also means that the JVM is the JavaScript of the programming-language-design world: almost everybody's first attempts EVER at PLT/language-design, were on top of the JVM
<ChrisKringle> ah. so Paws is meant to be a more flexible JVM then?
<ChrisKringle> Like, you could make lots of different languages on top of paws?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> so there's definitely a core of very advanced, interesting work on top of the JVM (JRuby, as well as more interesting things), but then a huge miasmatic cloud of toys and shit written by neophytes.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> hm.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> no more, no less.
<ChrisKringle> I see. So how is paws better than jvm?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> but the *kinds* of languages you can usefully build in the Rut sphere are mostly tapped out.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> There's room to *improve* that flavour of language beyond what's been designed so far (look at Rust.), but very little room to truly innovate.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Paws has *nothing* to do with the sorts of languages that are widely used nowadays. So, it's not about being better; just about being different.
<ChrisKringle> mhmm
<ELLIOTTCABLE> anyway. all nebulous word-crap.
<ChrisKringle> ok, so a different rut from the JVM one then?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> I've gotta go back afk. Somebody wake devyn up :P
<ELLIOTTCABLE> yes, exactly.
<ChrisKringle> cool
<ELLIOTTCABLE> one of our locals calls them oasises
<ChrisKringle> I'll definitely have to lurk itc then to see what you guys come up with... should be interesting.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> basically, local maxima in ‘quality of programmer life.’ If you go far enough away from the oasis you're used to, you'll likely eventually discover something completely different, but possibly better, than the best-of-the-best that is in the family of those things you're used to
<ELLIOTTCABLE> look at functional programming, or declarative programming.
* ELLIOTTCABLE laughs
<ELLIOTTCABLE> yep interesting's the word
<ChrisKringle> XD
<ELLIOTTCABLE> here's one for you: at the moment, we're working on a revision such that the instruction-sets you pass to the VM are *graphs*, not arrays.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> dependency graphs and dataflow graphs, specifically.
<ChrisKringle> what?
<ChrisKringle> sounds....
<ELLIOTTCABLE> instead of a program's instructions being processed as `a; b; c; d`, in a linear order,
<ChrisKringle> no way
<ELLIOTTCABLE> they're processed as `a [b; c]; d`, non-linearly.
<ChrisKringle> that is pretty sweet
<ELLIOTTCABLE> such that b and d can both be processed simultaneously, to the extent of the system's ability to parallelize
<ELLIOTTCABLE> lotsa cool shit like that.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> another, four-year-old example:
<ChrisKringle> so automatic parallelization?
<ChrisKringle> to an extent ofc...
<ELLIOTTCABLE> oh, definitely. Paws is hyper-massively-insanely concurrent. has to be, to be asynchronous in the way we want.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> but that's not as exciting as it sounds; ***performant*** concurrency is blasted hard. Paws doesn't achieve that worth shit.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> well, at least not now.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> it's just concurrent as a kind of … side-effect, of the other goals.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> one last example, because talking about my work is addictive, before I finally walk these poor dogs:
<ELLIOTTCABLE> in Ruby or JavaScript, you might write something like this:
<ELLIOTTCABLE> body.split.for_each( function(line){ print(line) } )
<ELLIOTTCABLE> basically, that's an asynchronous, or more accurately, *abstracted*, form of the traditional, imperative alternative:
<ELLIOTTCABLE> for ...; line = body.split.for_each.next(); print(line);
<ELLIOTTCABLE> or something of the like.
<gq> see ELLIOTTCABLE i brought you a new friend to play with
<ELLIOTTCABLE> in either case, it's a control-flow problem.
<gq> ChrisKringle: he always complains none of us are the kind of programmers he requires for his life's work ;)
<ELLIOTTCABLE> in Paws, there's an *entirely new* family of control-flow solutions; because it's explicitly CPS
<ELLIOTTCABLE> print( body.split() )
<ChrisKringle> wow...
<ELLIOTTCABLE> there's no stack; there's no ‘functions’ or ‘calls’, and most importantly in this example, there's no concept of ‘returning’
<ChrisKringle> ok, I'll be sure to lurk here then.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> so you get neat control-flow mechanics like that simple example
<ELLIOTTCABLE> instead, when a procedure has completed work (say, `split()`); it can spit results back as many times as it likes
<gq> ChrisKringle: thanks :D
<ChrisKringle> bai
<ELLIOTTCABLE> (gq: how you two know eachother?)
<ChrisKringle> a pr0n channel on irc
<ChrisKringle> :)
<ELLIOTTCABLE> anyway k bai
<ELLIOTTCABLE> awesome
<ELLIOTTCABLE> so, this channel, without the programming
<ELLIOTTCABLE> and without the sometimes puppies
<ChrisKringle> yeah...
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: yep! like ChrisKringle said
<ELLIOTTCABLE> have you two internet-sexteddddd? ;)
<ChrisKringle> gq: we must not speak any more of our past...
<ChrisKringle> XD
<gq> ChrisKringle: exactly, never
* gq zips lips & throws away the key
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: wouldn't u like to know? no i have a new internet gf named Bailey
<ELLIOTTCABLE> oh man, that brings back memories
<ELLIOTTCABLE> I knew a bailey once.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> ugh and *that* brought back *terrible* memories
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: she goes by Bailey or Kris
<gq> realname doesn't matter wif internet gfs
<gq> but my god can she cyber eat out
* gq dreamy eyed
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Internet Gfs™
<ELLIOTTCABLE> they're like gifs, minus the eye
<ELLIOTTCABLE> hahah it's a pun
<ELLIOTTCABLE> get it
<ELLIOTTCABLE> nope.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> oh.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> fine then.
* ELLIOTTCABLE bundles off
<gq> i fucking got it ELLIOTTCABLE jesus you type too fucking fast
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: enjoy fucking ur vinyl ;x
<ELLIOTTCABLE> penis in tiny spindlehole, GO
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Metric - Fantasies LP? bitch, put that in my FACE
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: i WILL
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: i've been so hypersexual lately q_q pls come here and seduce d while i watch
<gq> 'watch'
<gq> lol
<purr> lol
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<ELLIOTTCABLE> gq: meh
<ELLIOTTCABLE> also, sex
<ELLIOTTCABLE> general meh
<ELLIOTTCABLE> too much sex, not enough making. less desire for sex, more desire for making.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> ugh. In all the world, all I want, is to STOP MOVING for three solid months straight.
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: oh. so if we visit i can like...get drunk and lie all over you without problems >.>
<ELLIOTTCABLE> go nowhere. travel naught.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> LOL okay sure.
<purr> LOL
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: if you buy us tickets i'll visit you later this month, D too
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: or early or late October
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Fuck that. three exes in my house at once would be too damn much.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> chellio's living at my place through this coming month; and Angela's coming up on the Metra to visit, god knows how long she'll want to stay for
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: fucking angela
* gq gags
<ELLIOTTCABLE> I DONT EVEN HAVE WORDS FOR HOW MUCH POTENTIAL FOR AWKWARDNESS IS COMING INTO MY LIFE THIS MONTH
<ELLIOTTCABLE> what why
<ELLIOTTCABLE> I mean other than the obvious why
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: i mean the obvious why. she's ugly, she's STUPID, which is worse, idk why you can even look at her
<gq> i mean she's nice if you like that kind of thing but ELLIOTTCABLE she has the IQ of like...a pinecone
<gq> DO NOT TELL HER I SAID THAT
* gq glares
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<ELLIOTTCABLE> meh, disagree on all counts, ish.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> My only issues with her are mental stability and sexual nature.
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: that's why you have bad taste in women
<ELLIOTTCABLE> LOL valid
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: ah, well, fine
<gq> lol
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: i for instance? ugly, dumb, and crazier than a fox whose tail is on fire
<ELLIOTTCABLE> I don't really find myself attracted to her, but, I can *see* her attractiveness.
<gq> ah
<gq> i get that a lot.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Mind you, most of that is personality.
<gq> like "i'm not attracted to that but i could be"
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: yeah her personality is like burning hair. why.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> She's kind of a fucking firecracker.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Made of acid.
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: i know.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> On acid.
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: my memory is getting worse but it's not that bad i mean 'neptykips' really
<gq> even the word in my mouth feels like spitting out dead goldfish
<ELLIOTTCABLE> that was ANGELINA
<ELLIOTTCABLE> WRONG ONE
<gq> NEP TEE KIP Z
<gq> OH
<ELLIOTTCABLE> there's three
<gq> JESUS FUCKING CHRIST EC
<gq> STOP DATING WOMEN WITH THE SAME FUCKING NAME
<gq> D:
<gq> -what
<purr> <Nuck> my mangina
<gq> lol
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Angelina, Angela, the other one whose name I'm suddenly blanking on who turned out to be a crack whorep
<purr> lol
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<ELLIOTTCABLE> Fuck what WAS IT
<ELLIOTTCABLE> ANGELICA
<ELLIOTTCABLE> BISHFKR
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Oh my god there was a brief exchange with an Angela on Tinder
<nuck> MY GAPING SEXMAW
<ELLIOTTCABLE> It went well up to a point but UGH NOT ANOTHER ONE
<ELLIOTTCABLE> nuck!
<nuck> elliott!
<ELLIOTTCABLE> You know who I miss, nick?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> alexgordon.
<nuck> alexgordon left?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> didn't even notice until right now.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> When the hell did *that* happen?
<nuck> Meanwhile you just can't get rid of nuck
<ELLIOTTCABLE> On the brighter side, incomprehensibly Is back to being incomprehensibly incomprehensible.
<nuck> He's like herpes, he just keeps coming back
<ELLIOTTCABLE> no, that's glitter
<nuck> Meanwhile here I am doing boring things
<gq> glowcoil, not incomprehensibly
<nuck> Rails... and Node... and PHP... and misery... and wanting-to-jump-off-a-tall-building-because-Ember-sucks
<gq> anyway
<gq> nuck: look me up in #uk on rizon
<gq> nuck: me and end3r are pals just do a /whois in gq
<gq> on* gq
<nuck> gq: I basically never go on rizon
<gq> nuck: well guess who's here *points at ChrisKringle*
<gq> nuck: his name on rizon is m00tykins :3
<nuck> rofl
<ELLIOTTCABLE> gq: no, he's incomprehensibly again
<gq> nuck: i'm fucking like a 24/7 rizon cunt these days look waht you got me into
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: oh
<nuck> Is that actually chris poole or just some random idiot posing as moot
<gq> nuck: he says he used to have a more moot aligned nick but fangirls/boys kept PMing him to bother ;)
<ELLIOTTCABLE> lololol
<purr> lololol
<gq> nuck: he is random, but far from an idiot
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Oh god a 4channer
<gq> NO
<gq> DON'T KICK HIM OR I WILL BE ANGRY
* gq clings to ELLIOTTCABLE
<gq> -nest ELLIOTTCABLE
<gq> DAMMIT YOU GOT RID OF NEST
<nuck> ELLIOTTCABLE: Not a 4channer, the man who turned 4chan into less-disgusting-4chan
* gq makes a nest in ELLIOTTCABLE's hair to live
<gq> dat.
<nuck> The man who somehow managed to clean up /b/
<gq> the man
<gq> the LEGEND
<gq> i heard his hair is so big because it's full of seekrits
<nuck> I heard he wants to be a little girl
<gq> i heard he IS a little girl in russia
<nuck> Also can we just admit that Reddit is officially worse than 4chan now?
<nuck> Now that they're the primary source of shit-spewing on the internet
<gq> nuck: i have been since /r/shitredditsays banned me for oping a black lesbian
<gq> nuck: i was an archangelle :>
<nuck> I was laughing my ass off when I saw 4chan now has copyright fingerprinting
<nuck> Well
<nuck> "fingerprinting"
<ELLIOTTCABLE> 11:55 PM <nuck> Also can we just admit that Reddit is officially worse than 4chan now?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> ‘worse?’ no. ‘equivalent to?’ yes.
<nuck> It's apparently just a normal hash of the image
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: also that.
<gq> GOD DAMMIT
<gq> nuck never let me suicide again
<nuck> ELLIOTTCABLE: Nah. Reddit's gone down and 4chan's gone up. Mootykins has ramped up enforcement of the rules
<gq> i tried to an hero by stabbing my boob
<gq> SO MANY SCABS
<gq> FUCK
* gq annoyed
<nuck> Yeah that would be a bad idea
<gq> nuck: boxcutter, too. lucky it didn't break off in my chest. anyway now i have a bottle of 500 mg antibiotics to fucking take
<gq> they smell like literal shit
<gq> fucking amazing
<nuck> Okay I'm just gonna be honest, I have a huge entrepreneurial boner for mootykins
<gq> this is what mental health feels like
<gq> nuck: same
<gq> GAY 4 MOOT
<nuck> I'm gay for a lot of things
<gq> nuck: but actual moot, not ChrisKringle here lol
<purr> lol
<gq> nuck: i know ;)
* nuck hides the yaoi
* gq brings out da yuri
<gq> BOOBZ
<gq> nuck: i have an internet gf from rizon nao
<nuck> I almost had an internet bf like a month ago
<gq> nuck: never seen a pic, don't need one, she cybers like a 35 year old lesbian
<gq> omg
<nuck> They got b&
<gq> nuck: naice
<gq> haha
<gq> of course they did
<nuck> Not that I have time for relationships
<nuck> I'm busy working on pomf.se and hummingbird.me and all my side-projects
<ELLIOTTCABLE> 11:59 PM <gq> nuck: never seen a pic, don't need one, she cybers like a 35 year old lesbian
<ELLIOTTCABLE> oh god but what if she's like,
<ELLIOTTCABLE> that one
<nuck> an 85 year old lesbian
<nuck> With tits sagging to her knees
<nuck> What then?
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: who cares? LESBIAN. ORAL SEX FROM SOMEONE WHO AFTER I CUM DOESN'T GO "WOW THAT'S A STRONG TASTE"
<gq> fucking virgins
<gq> nuck: don't care.
<gq> ftr i've tasted it and it's fucking normal
<nuck> Not some long john silvers shit goin' on down there?
<gq> ...i feel you all know more now about my marriage than i intended
<gq> nuck: i have 2 trans woman sisters in law. my husband looks better in a dress and makeup than i do
<gq> being straight, what is it?
<gq> we just don't know.
<nuck> Being straight is just so boring
<gq> it super is
<gq> especially when you're intersex (nuck: confirmed) like me
<gq> BEING A GIRL BUT WITH A VOICE MISTAKEN FOR A MAN ON THE PHONE?
<gq> fucking wut.
<gq> soundcloud.com/gqbrielle
<gq> nuck, ELLIOTTCABLE ^^^^
<gq> listen plz
* gq whores out music
* gq strums a tiny ukelele
<gq> lalala
<nuck> 2busy discoing
<gq> nuck: fuq u
<nuck> but muh funk
<nuck> muh disco
<nuck> 2partay
<nuck> And honestly I can't be assed to open a web browser :D
<gq> nuck: ur not invited to muh birthday
<gq> nuck: there'll be blackjack and hookers
<gq> nuck: :C
<nuck> Speaking of birthdays... GUESS WHO IS DRUNK IN 32 DAYS
<gq> nuck: god you're so ....young
* gq is 25 as of last february
<gq> I'M GETTING OLD GUISE
<nuck> lol
<purr> lol
<gq> Q.Q
<gq> nuck: whatever, pm me for tit pix if you want since i'm camgirling these days
<gq> i make $20 anhour too
<nuck> >tit pics
<nuck> ew?
<nuck> tits are a nothankyou
<gq> nuck: ew yourself, these tits are awesum
<gq> nuck: wow you really are gay
<gq> O.O
<nuck> Yes, quite
<gq> nuck: or a str8 woman
* gq stares at peter
<nuck> I never liked tits to begin with
<gq> nuck: same i want top surgery
<gq> i miss my a cups
<gq> i miss running without fucking having to hold myself -.-
<nuck> I identify as a trap :^)
<nuck> boys in skirts are the best
<nuck> Or, more specifically, I just wish I didn't look so... guyish
<nuck> Manliness is disgusting
<nuck> Androgyny ftw
<gq> nuck: if you send me a pic i'd bet you look just fine tbqh
<nuck> Eh, I'm working on it
<gq> nuck: standards for women are so high. i know trans women who look more feminine than i do and i thought i was a cisgirl for uhhhh up til 23?
<nuck> Losing weight, trying to get in shape
<gq> nuck: anyway i know people with like FACIAL BONE DYSMORPHIA clinically diagnosed
<gq> shit's fucked.
<gq> nuck: i'm a reverse trap. i pass as male and gay men hit on me
<gq> gay men and bisexual/gay women
<gq> or str8 women
<gq> i'm a converter x-x
<nuck> I just have a round faceshape and thick hair
<gq> nuck: my half black sisinlaw confirms: my hair is not 'white'
<gq> jewfro ftfw
<nuck> rofl
<gq> i've broken combs before.
<gq> my mom used to have to pin me down and comb out the tangles
<gq> i didn't have a haircut til 8
<gq> nuck: in pix i look like a black haired merida
<gq> fucking ridonkulous
<nuck> ahahahahahhaha
<gq> xD
<nuck> I'm just a fat faggot right now
<nuck> In both the 4chan and the gay sense
<gq> nuck: i've been anorexic for 5 months? my body freaked out so hard it got pregnant as an emergency
<nuck> well then
<gq> nuck: of course my and my husband's blood has so many diseases they could call it literl blood cancer
<gq> nuck: so 3 weeks of bleeding and awful.
<gq> bye bye zygote.
<gq> :(
<nuck> yowch
<nuck> I'm just 185lbs and 5'5" which puts me slightly overweight
<nuck> But my goal is 140-150, which is low-middle ideal
<gq> when i was 11 i was 125
<nuck> I need to aim for low to get my thighs to be slightly less enormous
<nuck> Poor fat distribution is a family trait
<gq> genetics doesn't want me to be thin it wants me to be a stupid fat fuck with birthing hips and tits you could suffocate somebody with
<gq> FUCK YOU GENETICS I DO WHAT I WANT
<nuck> iktf
<gq> i mean i love fat women but i do not like what i see in the mirror
<gq> body dysmorphia AND dysphoria like fucking woah
<gq> >.<
<nuck> I also kind of hate that I can't figure out a good hairstyle
<nuck> I just look stupid no matter what
<nuck> I found something that looked roughly professional a while back
<nuck> But I haven't been able to reproduce. I should probably see a real stylist though
<nuck> Instead of supercuts
<nuck> Supercuts is like gambling
<nuck> You're gonna lose 99% of the time
<gq> nuck: yeah i have the Ramona Flowers haircut now
<gq> but with kim pine freckles
<gq> nuck: it looks so good my husband had a NIGHTMARE about me cutting my hair
* gq laughs herself sick
<nuck> Right now I just have long stupid looking hair
<gq> i like long hair on boys/androgynes
<gq> :3
<nuck> Almost ponytail length now
<nuck> Kinda funny, I look more professional with my hair tied back
<nuck> It's also more comfortable, really. But it won't be tieback length for another 3-4 months
<gq> nuck: yeah i miss being able to ponytail but i hvae to get my hair thinned ever 3 months as it is
<nuck> And california heat makes long hair unlivable, it greases up within 5 minutes of going outdoors :S
<gq> like, asian style, just whipping razors thru it
<gq> nuck: yeah i live on the desert half of washington
<gq> long hair on my neck = nope
<nuck> That's not my problem, I can put up with the hair on my neck
<nuck> Just bugs me that it greases up
<nuck> I'll have to shower twice a day if it gets more than a few inches longer
<nuck> I think I actually might have a genetic predisposition to being incredibly hairy. Like, multiple hairs per follicle
<nuck> Considering I have like 2-3 hairs per follicle
<gq> nuck: depends on your ethnicity. in pictures i can find dark germans/french, idk what ethnicity originally. somebody jewish or black somewhere
<gq> but those ones were the mimics, if they lived
<gq> "Oh no mister policeman, those damn krauts, I understand. And the Poles and Jews are worse, for sure!" *shut door* oh god i can't live like this
<gq> but they did :/
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<incomprehensibly> aw man i missed a discussion about gayness, tits, manliness, and androgyny
<gq> incomprehensibly: you really did but i'm still awake
<gq> i think ChrisKringle passed out
<gq> nuck
<gq> nuck nuck are you still awake
<gq> -nuck @ nuck
<purr> nuck: shut up nuck you are a nuck
<gq> lel
<gq> incomprehensibly: are you this nick again then?
<nuck> incomprehensibly, gq: Hi
<gq> nuck: tell incomprehensibly some stuff because uh
<gq> incomprehensibly: can i out you
<nuck> I'm just in #Node.js discussing ES6
<gq> >.>
<gq> 'can i out you' well that basically did whether you wanted to or not
* gq slaps self
<gq> bad gq, no cookie
<nuck> I'm still not sure what "out" but I knew there was some out involving them already. It's kind of... obvious
<incomprehensibly> gq: yeah because don't want to leave log trails of my music name :p
<gq> incomprehensibly: makes sense
<gq> nuck: heh
<incomprehensibly> gq: "can i out you" hahaha
<nuck> I just do everything as "nuck"
<gq> lol
<purr> lol
<gq> nuck: yeah same for gq/gqbrielle
<gq> i've lost interest in being closeted
<gq> i make an effort to not cuss on fb
<gq> but i reposted shit about being queer all the time
<gq> my pronouns are set to they
<gq> no fucks given
<nuck> I think I'm out to everybody except my dad and grandma
<nuck> Well except the whole trapping thing
<gq> nuck: i'm not actively out but the entire fam knows i've always been 2 butch, you know?
<gq> most of them don't care
<gq> but i'm too much myself to look comfortable in some of the getups my mom put me in as a child
<nuck> hah
<nuck> All the members on hummingbird (now that I'm a core dev everybody knows me) think I'm some kawaii anime boy or something
<nuck> It's great :3
<gq> nuck: because of my soundcloud rizon thinks i'm a really good trans man or a 14 year old gay boy
<nuck> They pretty much accept that I shit rainbows
<gq> nuck: unlss they g+ then they think i'm a trans woman, a fat one
<nuck> And have way too much yaoi
<gq> nuck: either way isn't ideal but w/e i don't care enough to correct them
<nuck> gq: ahaha confuse the fuck out of them
<gq> nuck: i do >:)
<gq> nuck: i'm no.1 on chanstats r/n
<gq> bipolar's great for outchatting everyone on the entire damn server
<gq> 9000 people and i'm louder than all of them
<nuck> I tend to outchat people too
<nuck> But that's mostly because I type in lots of lines
<gq> mhm
<nuck> Like this
<gq> nuck i do both on purpose
<gq> and Underdose in #uk loves my fucking chanstatting them to the top 10
<gq> so as long as i follow da rules like a good welsh grrrrl well
<gq> i'm his welsh grrl ;)
<nuck> One of the HB staff actually joked that "nuck why are all the lines always you"
<gq> nuck, rails and i send each other pictures and skype sexy chats
<nuck> rofl they think you're welsh
<gq> serverop friends = best friends
<nuck> ?
<gq> nuck, i am welsh
<nuck> oh
<gq> nuck, ethnically. i'm learning the language lol
<purr> lol
<gq> nuck, they have a bid going for my doxx, i hear it's up to $3k
<nuck> ... if you say "transethnic" I'm gonna jump in front of a bus
<gq> nuck, nope, google Thomas Vaughn
<gq> nuck, one of my ancestors
<nuck> So you're welsh in the same way I'm dutch?
<nuck> Awesome :D
<gq> yes, nuck
<nuck> Google "Rembrandt"
<nuck> One of my relatives
<gq> like 1/3, once i learn i can apply for UK citizenship
<gq> just on the basis of blood and speaking welsh.
* gq nods
<gq> nuck, naice
<incomprehensibly> fuck, incomprehensibly is too long for tiwtter
<gq> incomprehensibly: try a variation on it like quixotic or mercurial
<gq> incomprehensibly: or translate glowcoil into another language and pick something short and snappy
<nuck> incomprehensibly: Join the party of not getting your ideal name on Twitter ;_;
<incomprehensibly> i'm probably staying glowcoil, i just wanted to squat incomprehensibly
<nuck> I swear someday I'll buy @Nuck
<nuck> I also wanna pay off the guy who owns Nuck on github
<nuck> I hate NuckChorris it sounds so... 12yearold
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<gq> nuck: i like it
<gq> nuck: you could try to go by Chorris, just
<gq> ChorrisLejeck
<gq> i like it
<nuck> Okay is it weird that I'm rubbing my legs against every thing just to feel how smooth they are
<nuck> Because seriously it feels amazing
<gq> nuck: no
<gq> smooth legs are great
<nuck> They are
<gq> my new gf wants me to shave my uh
<gq> well
<gq> a place i normally just trim
<gq> so i guess i'm back to looking like a lipstick bisexual dyke again
<gq> can't say i mind, or my husband minds, heh
<nuck> >not removing all body hair
<nuck> I have very little body hair left... basically just my arms, and I'm gonna cut that off this winter
<gq> nuck: tfw i'm 2 lazy to bother literally shaving my ENTIRE FUCKING LEG every 3 days
<gq> nuck: i'm going to start waxing i think
<nuck> Epilator
<nuck> Or nair
<nuck> Nair is <3
<gq> nuck: that shit you can't put on your...uh...crotch, i'm too irresponsible with it
<gq> always afraid of chemical burns
<nuck> It's expensive as fuck bit it turns out it's great
<gq> i'll try nair
<gq> i've been using veet
<nuck> Not on your pubes
<gq> which smells like burning hair which is ironic
<nuck> hah
<nuck> It's all effectively just lye
<gq> i'm aware
<gq> i just want to zap it off
<gq> not even electrolysis
<nuck> Lazer treatment :D
<gq> science
<gq> help me out
<gq> nuck, doesn't work if you've got jew hair like i do
<gq> it might straiten it a but but bloody no
<gq> i like my curls.
<nuck> I doubt it'd work for me either
<gq> yeh.
<nuck> My armhair is so bad that I actually can't wear long sleeve shirts without actual physical pain
<nuck> I used to have to shave the tops of my feet before anything else, because I couldn't get my socks on without it catching
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<gq> nuck: see ionly JOKE about being a halfling/hobbit
<nuck> I guess what I'm saying is... my body wants me to be naked
<gq> i'm more like a very tiny elf with human hair
<gq> nuck: lol mine too, in my own room i'm always fucking naked
<purr> lol
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<gq> nuck: i actually run about a degree or two higher than is 'normal'
<nuck> weird
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<gq> nuck: i can also lower my body temperature/pulse thru meditation
<gq> nuck: when they say i'm a witch, they ain't joking :P
<nuck> Great, this terminal's jammed itself in the "GUI" position
<gq> nuck: lol
<purr> lol
<nuck> I'm hellbent on using ES6 to develop this thing
<nuck> Because ES5 is so shitty
<nuck> I'm gonna end up using the es6-transpiler I think
<incomprehensibly> nuck: is es6 the one with classes and shit
<nuck> ES6 adds fat arrow, for..of, generators, yield, array comprehensions, shorthand for objects { x, y: 5}, and more
<nuck> iirc
<nuck> And, yes, the class syntax
<gq> who knows
<nuck> It also adds rest args and the splat operator iirc
<nuck> Huuuuuuuuuuuge improvements over ES5
<gq> nuck i got ELLIOTTCABLE to talk PAWS shop with criskringle/m00tykins earlier if u saw
<gq> most shoptalk i've seen here in months tbqh
<gq> except when Cheery talks
<nuck> hah
<gq> nuck: i'm learning coding slowly
<gq> nuck: i can already script kiddie wit da best of them
<gq> rizon is great it really is
<nuck> Hmm so I guess I'll have to feed it through es6-transpiler
<incomprehensibly> there are more robot smut comics on the internet than i ever expected
<gq> incomprehensibly: that's like what is it, rule whatever of the internet
<gq> CAN WE PORN IT?
<gq> YES WE CAN
<nuck> Rule 34
<gq> ty
<incomprehensibly> nuck: i kind of despise the class syntax but, generators are the only feature that matters in any language
<nuck> incomprehensibly: The class syntax has gotten better over the past year or so
<nuck> It seems ... reasonable
<nuck> At least it's better than the crap Ember.js left me with
<nuck> I've formed a vendetta against Ember
<incomprehensibly> like basically i despise adding classes to javascript
<incomprehensibly> i'm good with a new language with classes from the ground up
<incomprehensibly> but that's adding more shit onto a shitpile
<nuck> Well it's not classes
<nuck> It's class-style syntax, but at the end of the day it's the same system underneath
<nuck> It's just sugar
<nuck> Meanwhile in *Ember* land, you have mixins and all kinds of other Ruby junk crammed down JS's throat
<nuck> Oh yeah and it's all poor OOP. YAY EMBER
<nuck> :|
<nuck> this.store.find('current_user') finds a CurrentUser instance
<nuck> in the ApplicationStore object
<nuck> Which was inexplicably set as the store property on the SettingsRoute object
<nuck> (this is real code I had to write earlier today)
<nuck> Now *that* is adding onto a shitpile. ES6 class syntax seems like a breath of fresh air by comparison
<nuck> I would love to see ELLIOTTCABLE thoroughly penetrate Ember.js in his usual manner
<incomprehensibly> haha
<gq> lol nuck
<purr> lol
<gq> 'in the usual manner'
<gq> gay gay gay gay
<gq> i have a standing offer incomprehensibly for a threesome with him and D
* gq sighs
<gq> tfw u married a str8 boy who lookjs better in a dress n makeup den me
<gq> sigh
<incomprehensibly> ooh my friend's (incidentally bi) boyfriend is like
<incomprehensibly> the exact fucking body type/voice for a frank n furter impersonation
<incomprehensibly> and is a REALLY good voice actor
<incomprehensibly> so we are all awaiting
<gq> incomprehensibly: don't you hate that? like you can look at them and go "give me 3 hours and i will make the best drag queen the world has ever seen"
<incomprehensibly> hahaha
<gq> or drag king in my case
<gq> incomprehensibly: google "andrew in drag" by the magnetic fields
<gq> dat video
<incomprehensibly> why have i not listened to more magnetic fields
<incomprehensibly> i love this video too
<gq> idk
<gq> they're glorious
<gq> Neil Gaiman turned me onto that
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<incomprehensibly> i have this cool neil gaiman picture book from the library on my floor right now
<incomprehensibly> gotye has such a glorious voice
<nuck> NOW YOURE JUST SOMEBODY THAT I USED TO KNOW
<nuck> (somebodyyyyyyyyy I used to know someboooooodddddyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy)
<gq> mhm
<nuck> Nah he actually is pretty great
<gq> i know
<joelteon> dum doo dee dum
<gq> joelteon: u don't say
<gq> -otters @ joelteon
<purr> joelteon: write-only stream
<joelteon> naw
<gq> -joelteon @ joelteon
<purr> joelteon: Not an otter.
<joelteon> i dont
<incomprehensibly> -micahjohnston
<purr> incomprehensibly: http://ell.io/ifI8A
<gq> joelteon: remember when i typed my pw in chan
<incomprehensibly> -glowcoil
<incomprehensibly> -incomprehensibly
<purr> incomprehensibly: http://cl.ly/8qke
<gq> nuck: you missed it i did a hunter 2 go look it up on pawschan
<joelteon> gq: ya
<incomprehensibly> http://cl.ly/8qke
* incomprehensibly http://cl.ly/8qke
<incomprehensibly> http://cl.ly/8qke
* incomprehensibly http://cl.ly/8qke
* incomprehensibly http://cl.ly/8qke
<incomprehensibly> http://cl.ly/8qke
<incomprehensibly> http://cl.ly/8qke
<gq> joelteon: my shame is very great
<gq> joelteon: brb an heroing
<joelteon> rip
<gq> rip
<incomprehensibly> just got an adrenaline burst from this dark evil pop music i am listening to
<gq> nice
<incomprehensibly> also 2am + coffee a couple hours ago
<incomprehensibly> but yeah thos combination of adrenaline is good
<nuck> oh god I accidentally committed $NIG to hummingbird.me
<gq> lol
<purr> lol
<nuck> There was also $FUCK and $DICKS and $BITCH but I didn't commit any of those
<gq> hahaha
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<nuck> Ugh. The main benefactor of pomf.se is annoyed at me for wanting to use node.js to rewrite it
<nuck> He says I should do it in something "better, like Go or C"
<nuck> "or even shell scripts"
<nuck> So basically he read Cat-V and soaked up their idiocy like a sponge
<gq> lol pomf.se
<purr> lol
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<nuck> gq: What of it
<gq> nuffin
<nuck> "what are we gonna do on the bed~"
<gq> o.o
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<audy> !songme in the end
<sharkbot> http://tinysong.com/ZODs In the End - Linkin Park
<audy> morning
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<gq> -what
<purr> <alexgordon> Nuck: had all your favourite PHP features, magic quotes, mysql_real_escape_string, zionism
<gq> -what
<purr> <joelteon> i think i'm going to make a freenode simulator
<gq> -what
<purr> <micahjohnston> rms is a retard who eats his feet and never makes anything
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<incomprehensibly> ok now i don't like that me using "retard" is in the whats
<incomprehensibly> -what
<purr> <gkatsev> eboy: for a sec I thought you were purr
<incomprehensibly> -what
<purr> <gqbrielle> I FUCKED A MERMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAID
<incomprehensibly> -what
<purr> <prophile> I wish nigger was more socially acceptable because it's a great onomatopoeia for the sound of a helicopter. niggerniggerniggerniggerniggerniggernigger
<incomprehensibly> -wat
<purr> incomprehensibly: what the ever loving fuck are you saying
<incomprehensibly> -what
<purr> <niggler> whitequark the market has spoek
<incomprehensibly> --
<purr> Let it be known that incomprehensibly hates .
<incomprehensibly> -!
<purr> incomprehensibly: ikr!!
<incomprehensibly> -what
<purr> <alexgordon> do salmon have vaginas? I don't think we ever got to the bottom of it
<incomprehensibly> -bot
<purr> incomprehensibly: elliottcable is a bot + + + + + does the robot <http://pawschan.tumblr.com/post/4967461441/bot>
<incomprehensibly> -robot
<incomprehensibly> -purr
* purr
<incomprehensibly> purr
<gq> -what
<purr> <prophile> I like my languages like I like my women: reducable to 3SAT
<incomprehensibly> purr he
<gq> -what
<purr> <sephr> the bits in this one new folder are really slow
<gq> -what
<purr> <alexgordon> micahjohnston: just explain applicative functors and they'll be sure you're 21
<gq> -what
<purr> <whitequark> I find it fascinating that when you insert your penis into someone, that's actually myriads and myriads of stable excitations of electromagnetic field interacting with each other as described by some obscure math
<gq> -what
<purr> <locks> I was attempting a yoke, but it was a leaky abstraction and I ended up with scrambled eggs
<gq> -what
<purr> <ELLIOTTCABLE> my period moved D:
<gq> lol
<purr> lol
<incomprehensibly> -what
<purr> <devyn> please, Nuck couldn't generate a word cloud if his hair were on fire
<incomprehensibly> -what
<purr> <alexgordon> Euler's artistic penis?
<incomprehensibly> -what
<purr> <elliottcable> sometimes I feel like the gqbrielle of programmers.
<incomprehensibly> -what
<purr> <substack> dropped a lot of haskell at university
<incomprehensibly> -what
<purr> <prophile> "love truncheon"
<incomprehensibly> -what
<purr> <ellio> IT IS SO DELICIOUS I WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH ALL OF THESE TINY WINDOWS
<gq> -gqbrielle
<purr> gq: she is not devyn (I think.)
<gq> -gq
<purr> gq: genderqueer
<gq> -mix
<purr> gq: shut up you fuckers i'm awesome and like elliott but better 'cos tits
<gq> hahahahahahahahaha
<incomprehensibly> -devyn
<purr> incomprehensibly: he is so wat right now
<incomprehensibly> -incomprehensibly
<purr> incomprehensibly: http://cl.ly/8qke
<incomprehensibly> look at dat guy
<incomprehensibly> just take a look
<incomprehensibly> -elliottcabl
<incomprehensibly> -battlecollie
<purr> incomprehensibly: fucking. He’s elliottcable, obviously. *idiot*.
<incomprehensibly> -elliottcable
<purr> incomprehensibly: literally a cuking jerk. boo hiss
<gq> eee
<incomprehensibly> -ec
<purr> incomprehensibly: literally a cuking jerk. boo hiss
<gq> so tiny a squirrel! incomprehensibly
<gq> hehe
<incomprehensibly> gq: it's my favorite picture that's been taken
<incomprehensibly> -inimino
<purr> incomprehensibly: inimino is a thin client.
<incomprehensibly> -whitequark
<purr> incomprehensibly: he is actually redquark. http://ell.io/iZi8J
<incomprehensibly> -.
<incomprehensibly> ---
<incomprehensibly> -?
<purr> incomprehensibly: ?!
<incomprehensibly> -help
<purr> incomprehensibly: You're beyond help.
<incomprehensibly> -vil
<purr> incomprehensibly: the one who wears rugs.
<incomprehensibly> -jeannicolas
<purr> incomprehensibly: bewbs
<incomprehensibly> lolllll
<incomprehensibly> -audy
<incomprehensibly> ok sorry everyone
<incomprehensibly> i really am sorry
<gq> <@purr> incomprehensibly: he is actually redquark. http://ell.io/iZi8J <---------------- that one is a broken link
<gq> if it matters
<incomprehensibly> elliott probably did something about his drply account becasue they're all dead
<gq> yeh
<nuck> hello sluts
<gq> hello nuck
<gq> -nuck @ nuck
<purr> nuck: shut up nuck you are a nuck
<nuck> shut up gq you are a gq
<gq> listen pls
<gq> no
<gq> -mix @ nuck
<purr> nuck: shut up you fuckers i'm awesome and like elliott but better 'cos tits
<gq> >:}
<joelteon> you don't have tits
<joelteon> oh wait
<joelteon> i thought that was nuck talking
<joelteon> i don't know about gq
<joelteon> so like fat girl tits
<gq> better than fat boy tits like you got, joelteon you fat fuck
<joelteon> no i have bench press tits
<gq> joelteon: pix or stfu
<joelteon> sec
<gq> k
<joelteon> i think i have 1 in my dropbox
<gq> k
<alexgordon> incomprehensibly!
<gq> alexgordon! ELLIOTTCABLE was claiming you had left us
<alexgordon> he was?
<gq> alexgordon: yeah last night i guess idk
<alexgordon> I've been here all the time...
<gq> joelteon: honey i can deadlift you. skinny ass fuck and i bet you got a butterface too
<ELLIOTTCABLE> alexgordon: strange. Thought I hadn't seen you in a while.
* gq dusts her shoulders off & goes back to script kiddieing
<alexgordon> ELLIOTTCABLE: yeah it's been quiet in here
<joelteon> i can deadlift me too
<gq> joelteon: you can't weigh more than 250.
* gq bored
<joelteon> i don't weigh anywhere near 250
<gq> joelteon: good. so, skinny worthless ass swimmer muscled fuck
<alexgordon> I can deadlift at least 20
* gq snorts
<joelteon> i think my deadlift 1rm is
<joelteon> let me check
<gq> alexgordon: i can deadlift 125 if i haven't been practicing, 235 if i have
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Oh my god gq and joelteon arguing about their leet bodies
<ELLIOTTCABLE> cannot even handle
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: you wanna ticket to the gun show? ;)
<joelteon> this thing says my deadlift 1rm is 253
* gq laughs
<nuck> what is this place coming too, bodybuildingforums?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> if it's an actual outdoorsman show, then yes
* alexgordon has a shit body
<gq> joelteon: i'll break your thing and your face
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: yep! i'll get oiled up and everything
<ELLIOTTCABLE> if it's you lifting weights, then no
<alexgordon> gq: LOL
<purr> LOL
<joelteon> how much can you bench gq
<gq> joelteon: last time i checked i was 17, so about............150? i forget
<nuck> ELLIOTTCABLE: Not even lifting weights, just masturbating over integers
<ELLIOTTCABLE> All of those are dumb exercises
<gq> i know all teh guys in the weights class looked at me funny after that
<gq> i'm better at leg stuff
<gq> c'mere joelteon i'll kick ya to death
<ELLIOTTCABLE> l2squats, and proper, controlled curls.
<joelteon> this is all very interesting, but how much do you squat? let's quantify the progress in absolute terms we all understand, like pounds on a bar through full ROM
<nuck> Learn to do kegels
<nuck> I bet I can do better kegels than any of you
<gq> joelteon: buy me a gym membership at one of the places that don't smell like jizz and bodybuilder's tears and i'll send you some hard data
<gq> hard like my biceps.
* gq grins
<ELLIOTTCABLE> nuck: wat.
<purr> beep.
<joelteon> <1bw?
<gq> -nuck @ joelteon
<purr> joelteon: shut up nuck you are a nuck
<ELLIOTTCABLE> yeah, this conversation is my cue to leave.
<nuck> ELLIOTTCABLE: Dude, you gotta keep your butthole nice and tight
<joelteon> no wonder you're mad
<nuck> kegels are important
ChrisKringle has quit [Ping timeout: 252 seconds]
<gq> joelteon: why, because i could benchpress you in my sleep?
<gq> why would i be mad about that?
* gq laughs
<joelteon> pulling 250 deadlift is ok but not when it's 1x your bodyweight
<gq> joelteon: are you accusing me of something? :)
<nuck> I don't lift weights, I'm too fat for that
<gq> i do lift weights, i am built for it
<joelteon> i can do that after training for 5 weeks
<gq> ask ELLIOTTCABLE i look like a fucking square with a circle drawn over it
<nuck> I jog and shit
<gq> my genetics are like TITS AND HIPS TITS AND HIPS TITS AND HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIPS
<joelteon> a 1x bodyweight deadlift is novice tier
<nuck> Yesterday I walked 6 miles
<gq> i'm like fuck my genetics and fuck da rules
<gq> joelteon: well i'm not a novice, unlike, say, you
<joelteon> muh genetics...
* gq flicks joelteon's nose
<joelteon> i had some genetics for breakfast today
<gq> joelteon: what's your excuse? you really are an otter. well i'm an orca. i'm not built for looking pretty, i'm built to tear baby seals to pieces
ChrisKringle has joined #elliottcable
<gq> chomp chomp bitch~
<joelteon> oh, ok, good
gq is now known as Onyx
<Onyx> hey joelteon wanna have a pokefight ;)
Onyx is now known as gq
<joelteon> i mean im just saying deadlifting your bodyweight isnt really all that impressive
<joelteon> its better than untrained obviously
<gq> last i checked joelteon you weren't my doctor
<gq> joelteon: how much do you think i weigh, and what is my height?
<joelteon> do you not lift a lot
<gq> i'll wait.
<gq> inb4 lulz
<gq> joelteon: i lift 3x a week because i'm not a stupid baby who has to have a gym and a personal trainer to keep fit
<joelteon> how did we get into this anyway
<gq> joelteon: i believe you said i had 'fat girl tits'
<joelteon> oh right cause you said you could deadlift me
<gq> joelteon: no, you insulted me.
<joelteon> you can deadlift 160 pounds...good job
<gq> joelteon: i demand a duel at sunset
<gq> joelteon: i didn't say how much i can deadlift now.
<joelteon> i think my cat can deadlift 160 pounds
<gq> joelteon: why, is your cat pretty, smart, and dedicated like me?
<joelteon> yeah, but you said "i could deadlift you" like that's some kind of feat of strength
<gq> i ain't no god damn cougar, i'm just Bagheera
<gq> joelteon: it's not. that's the point
<gq> joelteon: you're a 90 pound weakling in my eyes
* gq spits on joelteon's shadow & walks off
<joelteon> brb i gotta go to lunch but i'll be happy to continue this after
<joelteon> back in 30
<gq> enjoy your gainz
<alexgordon> what the fuck has been going on in here
<gq> alexgordon: i posted pix. joelteon said i had 'fat girl tits' bitching ensued
* gq shrugs
<purr> ¯\(º_o)/¯
<alexgordon> gq: where's the pic?
<gq> alexgordon: just a sec
<katlogic> tit for fat
<katlogic> sorry, terrible pun
* katlogic gets the hose
<gq> katlogic: if i put the lotion on my skin can we skip da hose?
<alexgordon> lolol
<purr> lolol
<alexgordon> nsfw? there's not even a nipple!
<katlogic> gq: Not sure if innuendo or not.
<gq> alexgordon: yeah but everyone here is a programmer
<gq> katlogic: whynotboth.jpg
<gq> alexgordon: you post anything vaguely resembling a tit on most grammer workplaces and everyone FREAKS.OUT.
<gq> IS THAT A TIT
<gq> I THINK I SEE AREOLA
<gq> HOLY SHIT GET HER DOXX
<alexgordon> gq: I don't understand america
<gq> CALL HER MOM
<gq> alexgordon: i don't either q.q
<alexgordon> nipples = job lost, but drinking at work = just fine
<alexgordon> it's the opposite here
<gq> alexgordon: exactly.
<gq> alexgordon: or in san fran, nipples = lower pay and sexual harassment
<katlogic> gq: If thats you then yeah, youre kinda fat, in sorta cute nerdy sort of way.
<katlogic> Most likely fuckable.
<gq> katlogic: tyvm ;)
<gq> my husband certainly agrees
<gq> AND my new gf
<gq> so where Mr. Otters gets off i don't know and i don't want to know
<gq> (lulz 'gets off')
<alexgordon> man this channel attracts all types
<gq> it really does
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Oh my effing her
<ELLIOTTCABLE> this whole conversation.
<gq> ... ELLIOTTCABLE wat
<gq> -mix @ ELLIOTTCABLE
<purr> ELLIOTTCABLE: shut up you fuckers i'm awesome and like elliott but better 'cos tits
<gq> 0:3
<ELLIOTTCABLE> "like elliottcable"
<ELLIOTTCABLE> I don't see how. :P
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: blue eyes, some blonde ancestors, we could make some pretty pretty pretty german babbies
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: also d and his redneck cousins taught me to shoot so THAT'S alright
<gq> little late for me to be a girl scout but i can fish and hunt
* gq shrugs
<purr> ¯\(º_o)/¯
<gq> yas
<gq> ...
<gq> alexgordon: silence from ec. i think im' bout ta get my monthly #elliottcable kb
<katlogic> This place turned too much aryan, ELLIOTTCABLE your race profiling skills suck.
<gq> katlogic: i have black hair. i'm no aryan, even if i got gadje eyes
<katlogic> gq: People describe me as a "dirty aryan" or whatever that means
<gq> katlogic: ah, yeah.
<gq> katlogic: i had a guy on rizon tell me YOU HAVE TO BE LATINA YOU WHORE YOUR BUTT AND BOOBS ARE TOO BIG FOR YOU TO BE WHITE
<gq> which, a) wow b) wow c).... d) wow e) lulz
<katlogic> hahahaha yeah
<gq> xD
<katlogic> On a contrarian note, I'd wager most computer geek people are simply generally ugly.
<gq> katlogic: i'd agree
<katlogic> aka neckbeard women are pretty much just as neckbeard men
<gq> like...most good programmers are like engineers. they focus on the details and miss the forest for the moss on the trees.
<katlogic> gq: Well, theres also the subject of unrealistic expectations (both in beauty, or even social skill women expect from their geeky SOs), yeah.
<gq> katlogic: yes.
<gq> my father is an engineer, i'm a crazy goodfornothing bitch and my husband is finally going to school to be a sysadmin
<katlogic> gq: Wow, you turned it around.
<katlogic> *you are trying to transform him into a neckbeard*
<katlogic> wow, what a vixen power
<alexgordon> back
<alexgordon> see this is why we need micah
<katlogic> gq: I never managed to converted a girl into my neckbeard interests.
<alexgordon> #elliottcable with micah: "let's talk about functional programming"
<alexgordon> #elliottcable without micah: LOOK AT MY TITS
<katlogic> Or maybe with some very limited success
<gq> alexgordon: he's here ---> incomprehensibly
<gq> alexgordon: and they were offered just to share, not to camwhore.
* gq slaps alexgordon
<alexgordon> ouch
<gq> damn right.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> alexgordon: you mis-interpret.
<gq> alexgordon: i brought ChrisKringle here last night for some shoptalk.
<nuck> sharing is caring, unless they're tits
<gq> alexgordon: don't you dare imply i'm bringing this chan down to my level just by sharing bloody pictures of my fucking self
* gq angry
<ELLIOTTCABLE> "The parts of #ELLIOTTCABLE alexgordon pays attention to when Micah's around: functional programming."
<nuck> Share dick pics maybe
<gq> i expect this shit from joelteon, alexgordon, but not from you
<ELLIOTTCABLE> "The parts of #ELLIOTTCABLE alexgordon pays attention to when Micah's absent: tits."
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: yes, that.
<katlogic> gq: You did well. If you didnt post tits, you'd have to gtfo.
<nuck> ELLIOTTCABLE: alexgordon isn't complete without micah. His brain stops focusing and starts boobing
<gq> katlogic: right? or admit i'm actually a man. that's how that works right?
<alexgordon> gq: duuuuude, my job here is to troll you all
<katlogic> It's so rare to find internet-law abiding women.
<gq> alexgordon: my job here is to call everyone out on their fucking bullshit.
<gq> alexgordon: and you sir, are so full of shit your eyes are brown.
<alexgordon> gq: I guess we're evenly balanced
<nuck> My job here is to...
<gq> alexgordon: please.
<nuck> Be nuck
<nuck> I guess
<gq> alexgordon: don't flatter yourself.
* gq angry still
* alexgordon laughs
<yorick> gq: you can't be genderqueer and then be all "yay I have tits"
* gq laughs too
<gq> yorick: yes i can. why the fuck not?
<yorick> can you?!
<gq> yorick: if i can't go out without people trying to grope me, why not use them for what they're good for?
<gq> i hate my fucking tits
<gq> i tried to stab myself in the heart last month
<gq> mostly because of gender dysphoria
<gq> caused by an accidental pregnancy.
<gq> i almost died, the zygote DID die
<ELLIOTTCABLE> nuck: "alexgordon isn't complete without micah. His brain stops focusing and starts boobing" wat.
<purr> beep.
<gq> hoo fucking ray.
<yorick> ok then.
<gq> yorick: alas, poor yorick, i knew him well....he was a giant twat
<alexgordon> ELLIOTTCABLE, nuck: too fucking right
gq is now known as Ophelia
<katlogic> It does not matter. Tits are tits. The internet law governing all cam people are not specific in regards to primary sexual signatures.
<yorick> I'm a twat? this is news!
<Ophelia> katlogic: indeed
<Ophelia> yorick: you're dead, if we're gonna quote hamlet
* Ophelia picks yorick's skull up and monologues
<Ophelia> ~
<ELLIOTTCABLE> "Monologues"
<yorick> yeah I know that, that's how they always do it wrong
<ELLIOTTCABLE> "~"
Ophelia is now known as gq
<yorick> "I knew him well"
<gq> yorick: you do it wrong you idiot
<gq> ALAS POOR YORICK
<ELLIOTTCABLE> That was the best monologue in the history of mankind.
<gq> I KNEW HIM WELL
<gq> SOMETHING SOMETHING
<yorick> no stahp
<gq> HE HAS DANDLED ME ON HIS LAP A THOUSAND TIMES
<yorick> you have fat girl tits.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> stahp
<gq> yorick: better that than a butterface like you
<ELLIOTTCABLE> ugh be nice, I like gq
* gq smooches ELLIOTTCABLE
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: i like you too!
<ELLIOTTCABLE> gq be nice, I like my channel
* ELLIOTTCABLE pats everyone genially
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: i do too! i prefer when it was Hat because better jokes but it's still p. good
<yorick> genitally?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> simultaneously, because I have exactly 48 hands
<alexgordon> god
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: naice
<ELLIOTTCABLE> That *sounds* exciting, but generally they're just difficult to coordinate
<katlogic> ELLIOTTCABLE: Its hard to keep balance and dont come off as a SJW douche, aint it?
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: no it sounds exciting because i know i could tie you down very efficiently with them then tease you for hours. sexually.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> put it this way: the off-hand is generally X percent less dexterous than the primary hand …
<gq> :>
<ELLIOTTCABLE> well, the third hand is exponentially less dexterous than *that*.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> And the pattern repeats all the way down.
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: pls respond to my sexual joke usually that works on all the malegrammers
<gq> pls respond
<gq> q.q
<ELLIOTTCABLE> the 8th through 48th hands are basically useless lumps of flesh.
<gq> omfg
<gq> THIS IS WHY WE BROKE UP
* gq smacks ELLIOTTCABLE with a boob
<gq> FUCKING PAY ATTENTION TO ME
<gq> D:
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Boob what
<gq> lel
<katlogic> Romance, betrayal, debauchery.
<gq> katlogic: correct
<ELLIOTTCABLE> I CAN'T TYPE ON A PHONE AND READ AT THE SAME TIME
<katlogic> What comes next.
<gq> actually you know how i met ELLIOTTCABLE
<gq> i was trying to hit on his roommate
<gq> then i fucked it up
<ELLIOTTCABLE> katmance, katrayal, katauchery.
<gq> i called him ELLIOTTCABLE
<gq> and he was like WHAT THE FUCK
<gq> THAT UGLY AUTISTIC FUCK
<gq> WHYIOUGHTA
<gq> oh christian, i don't miss you at all
<gq> -.-;;;
<ELLIOTTCABLE> gq: man have I told you how retarded Christian is now
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: you have and i laughed my ass off becuase he was always that dumb
<ELLIOTTCABLE> also "hit on"
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: trust me i tried to hit on him.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> read, "sext"
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: he was 2 dumb 4 me
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: no, cybering via AIM
<ELLIOTTCABLE> AIM D:
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: remember AIM? lol
<purr> lol
<katlogic> gq: Im so glad to be on the opposite side of the planet, at a safe distance from all of this drama volcano.
<gq> katlogic: lel
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Why is "AIM" the disturbing part of that sentence, not "cyber ing"
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: because AIM
<ELLIOTTCABLE> katlogic: there's very little drama :P
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Just good ol' memories
<gq> <+ELLIOTTCABLE> katlogic: there's very little drama :P
<gq> ahahahahaha
<gq> AHAHAHAHAHA
<gq> HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
<gq> OMFG
<gq> DYING
<gq> <+ELLIOTTCABLE> katlogic: there's very little drama :P
<gq> ...
<gq> PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFHAHAHAGHAHAHAHAHAHA
* ELLIOTTCABLE eyebrows
* gq screaming laughing irl
<gq> i can't breathe
<gq> jesus christ
<gq> ec
<ELLIOTTCABLE> katlogic: apparently I was wrong. :P
<gq> remember when you literally
<gq> GRILLED YOUR HANDS
<gq> xD
<gq> i bet alexgordon remembers
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Well yeah. I didn't say this *channel* didn't have exciting dramatic developments. :P
<gq> PEPPERIDGE FARM REMEMBERS
<alexgordon> yep
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: k good
<katlogic> ELLIOTTCABLE: It's either that, or super neckbeard macho culture.
<alexgordon> elliott's hands are really tasty
<katlogic> ELLIOTTCABLE: It usually goes downhill either way.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Just the you-me-Christian love triangle from … 2007? 2008? idevenkay.
<katlogic> when people get personal that is
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: 2009
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: spring 2009. wtf is ur memory bro
<ELLIOTTCABLE> katlogic: no waaaaaaay
<ELLIOTTCABLE> 2009? really?
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: also i met you because i was ranting at bluebie about republicans and you butted in WHAT'S WRONG WITH BEING A REPUBLICAN? I'M REPUBLICAN
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: YES
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Oh yeah because Paws was spring 2010,
<gq> yep
<ELLIOTTCABLE> And that means Erica was fall 2009,
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Erika*,
<gq> don't fucking talk about her
<gq> I STILL HAVE THAT PICTURE
<ELLIOTTCABLE> which means you fuckers were sprig 2009. wow.
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: yep
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Oh, I've seen worse on Facebook, now.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> -clouds
<purr> ELLIOTTCABLE: is stuck up in the clouds; hilight 'em if you want 'em.
<gq> -mix @ ELLIOTTCABLE
<purr> ELLIOTTCABLE: shut up you fuckers i'm awesome and like elliott but better 'cos tits
<gq> -what
<purr> <darkf> no you're bad for other reasons
<gq> -what
<purr> <gqbrielle> anything that makes elliottcable mad is funny.
<gq> -what
<purr> <alexgordon> only elliottcable could unwittingly name something after bloody anuses
<katlogic> So anyhow, anyone else willing to post nudes?
<gq> <@purr> <gqbrielle> anything that makes elliottcable mad is funny.
<gq> <@purr> <gqbrielle> anything that makes elliottcable mad is funny.
<gq> <@purr> <gqbrielle> anything that makes elliottcable mad is funny.
<gq> katlogic: yes, but you have to go first, i already showed most of mine
<katlogic> since youre not talking about programming at all you guys.
<katlogic> meh, ok
<alexgordon> katlogic: I seriously doubt anybody wants to see nudes from anybody in here :P
<ELLIOTTCABLE> katlogic: don't blame me, Cheery and gq's new sext-toy are both afk, incomprehensibly makes music now, and alexgordon doesn't care.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> and I think inimino and devyn both transcended.
<katlogic> does that work?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> I'm *happy* to talk about programming.
<alexgordon> me too
<katlogic> its kinda from distance, but I guarantee you its all for your safety.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> katlogic: LOL WHAT
<purr> LOL
<gq> katlogic: yes actually. NICE BUTT
<katlogic> tyvm :)
<ELLIOTTCABLE> -katlogic
<purr> ELLIOTTCABLE: The #ELLIOTTCABLE Minister of Genocide
<ELLIOTTCABLE> -learn katlogic = The minister of butt. http://d.pr/i/sPKf
<purr> ELLIOTTCABLE: Learned `katlogic`.
<gq> i got married in that tie
<alexgordon> WARNING PLEASE
<gq> btw that pic is like 3 years old
<ELLIOTTCABLE> gq: ‘and nothing else’
<gq> so i don't want to hear anything about the dyke hair
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: lol i wish
<ELLIOTTCABLE> you look a bit like this gq girl I'm vaguely into
<ELLIOTTCABLE> er
<gq> AHAHAHAHAHA
<ELLIOTTCABLE> gq, er, ‘they’
<ELLIOTTCABLE> so bad at this
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: lol
<alexgordon> LOL
<gq> sfw
<ELLIOTTCABLE> frankly, I'd hit on them more if I wasn't afraid of calling them ‘her’ and getting slapped.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> they're very pronoun-neutral.
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: i'd never slap you unless you asked for it
<ELLIOTTCABLE> awwwww, I remember that gq!
<ELLIOTTCABLE> not the event. the photo.
<gq> :D
<gq> yeah!
<katlogic> gq: Aww, that one looks cute.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> oh my god so I have this friend
<gq> was on myspace for a bit
<gq> katlogic: lemme dig up me and D on my wedding day, the courthouse wedding
<alexgordon> ELLIOTTCABLE: "<+ELLIOTTCABLE> gq: you look a bit like this gq girl I'm vaguely into" wat.
<purr> beep.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> quite attractive and such, works for apple in deep black ops shit now, it's weird,
<ELLIOTTCABLE> broke my best friend's heart, is his ex,
<gq> alexgordon: that's what i said ^.~
<ELLIOTTCABLE> she once shared this secret with me.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> that I am now about to share with all of you, for lulz.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> there was this one particular ex, who was into being dominated.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> wasn't really her thing, at the time, but she complied, or tried to.
<alexgordon> gq: at what age is senior prom?
<gq> alexgordon: 18
<ELLIOTTCABLE> gq: what. are you doing. with your face.
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: smiling :)
<ELLIOTTCABLE> it looks like you just ate incomprehensibly's squirrel
<ELLIOTTCABLE> and it's trying to come back up.
<gq> HAHAHAHA
<katlogic> ELLIOTTCABLE: go on
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE YOU'RE SUCH A BITCH HAHAHAHA
<gq> xD
<ELLIOTTCABLE> anyway so,
<katlogic> ELLIOTTCABLE: dont leave us hanging about apple-dom
<ELLIOTTCABLE> gets to the point where apple-dom has to slap the guy hard, in the face, to get him off
<ELLIOTTCABLE> more particularly, she does so when *she's* getting off, 'cuz, y'know, coörgasm
<ELLIOTTCABLE> see where this is going?
<gq> i think so
<gq> but finish us off
<ELLIOTTCABLE> for years, up until very recently … she couldn't come without reflexively slapping whoever she was cumming *on top of*, in the face.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> hard.
<gq> (like she was trying to)
<gq> OH GOD
<gq> oh no
<gq> oh god i do see where it's going
<ELLIOTTCABLE> yep.
<gq> nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
<gq> what...what did you do to her
<gq> O_O
<ELLIOTTCABLE> me? nothing.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> I wouldn't hit that. Not my type.
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: but you'd bang /me?/ wtf is ur defect
<ELLIOTTCABLE> she's … weird. Not in the awesome way I find attractive, in a very … non-geeky way.
<gq> i see
<ELLIOTTCABLE> Frankly, she just gives me these druggie vibes. She doesn't even do drugs, at least not much,
<ELLIOTTCABLE> maybe some acid, enough pot to bother me I suppose,
<katlogic> nah, just the regular crazy
<ELLIOTTCABLE> but she just *seems* like a fucking crackhead.
<alexgordon> ELLIOTTCABLE: where do you find these girls?
<katlogic> indeed the crazy must have some nice touch to it to be worth the trouble
<gq> alexgordon: do you really want him to answer that
<alexgordon> yes
<gq> o well go on then
<ELLIOTTCABLE> my basement.
* gq popcorn.gif
<gq> ;siyfa;osdifya;sidfy
<gq> FUCK
<ELLIOTTCABLE> they're all a little broken when I let them out.
<gq> i choked on my root beer
<gq> FUCKING STOP
* gq crying laughing
<gq> wiat this isn't root beer
<gq> um
<gq> my RC
<gq> lol
<purr> lol
<ELLIOTTCABLE> all the Peeps and classical music,
<alexgordon> I didn't know ELLIOTTCABLE was austrian
<ELLIOTTCABLE> it'd break anybody.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> ‘RC’
<ELLIOTTCABLE> that still exists?
<gq> alexgordon: he's bloody aryan he looks like Hitler's seeekrit blonde lovechild
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: yep!
<alexgordon> gq: is he actually german?
<katlogic> -learn katlogic = http://d.pr/i/sPKf -> The key to a good relationship is knowing when the fucking you are getting is worth the fucking you are getting.
<purr> katlogic: Learned `katlogic`.
<gq> alexgordon: yes
<gq> alexgordon: by the broken lock that freed me.
* gq nods
* alexgordon is german but not _those_ germans
<gq> alexgordon: i am german and yes those bloody germans. they were over here during the war but they were cheering hitler on
<gq> believe you me.
* gq shakes head
<gq> katlogic: lol ilu
<katlogic> That motto is also why I'm single
<katlogic> Women are just crazy
<ELLIOTTCABLE> manveru!
* ELLIOTTCABLE pats katlogic
<ELLIOTTCABLE> it's okay, men are crazy too.
<gq> lel
<manveru> i'm austrian, ffs
<gq> yeh trust me katlogic whatever your exes have done, ELLIOTTCABLE has done it but worse
<ELLIOTTCABLE> blame the industriphilliac complex.
<gq> manveru: oh. edelweiss?
<manveru> genau
<ELLIOTTCABLE> gq: ELLIOTTCABLE has *done* it?
<ELLIOTTCABLE> I consider myself ex-tame. I just *have* the crazy exes.
<gq> manveru: Ich entschuldige mich. mein Freund Alex und ich waren nur ein Scherz.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> hell, the worst things I've ever done, were done to people I *haven't* dated. >:
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: no, see, i know all your secrets.i love you anyway doe
<ELLIOTTCABLE> gq: is that a beer?
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: where?
<alexgordon> the austrians love me so much they keep sending me letters!
<ELLIOTTCABLE> gq: you keep saying that, but apparently *I* don't know all my secrets. o_O
<ELLIOTTCABLE> alexgordon: LOL
<purr> LOL
<ELLIOTTCABLE> <micahjohnston> the question mark is a good character
<gq> ELLIOTTCABLE: you don't. your memory is bad. sometimes i'll quote stuff you said in 2009 and you'll go WHAT CRAZY FUCK SAID THAT
<gq> badnewsbears.jpg
<katlogic> gq: You probably know it yourself. Geeks are emotionally fragile, we're like children in adult bodies.
<gq> katlogic: i'm fragile for other reasons. tfw PTSD, bipolar 1, and other shit too.
<gq> :|
<manveru> sounds like a party in here
<ELLIOTTCABLE> okay so this is annoying.
<ELLIOTTCABLE> whitequark's logbot doesn't allow me to disable -f.
* manveru goes back to learning nixos
<gq> manveru: Spaß haben, Person, die ich nicht sehr gut noch kennen!
<gq> german grammar how the actual fuck does it work
<alexgordon> with difficulty
<yorick> completely not like that
<gq> yorick: heh
<gq> I'm learning Welsh.
<katlogic> gq: Covert narcissist and failure at life hailing from here. I think those are fairly common, though.
<manveru> it stabs you in the back, even if you look it in the eyes
<gq> It's throwing everything else out the window.
<gq> manveru: i'm french/german/welsh. believe me, i know.
<yorick> manveru: nooo don't nixos
<manveru> i was in japan for 7 years, and forgot almost all my german :(
<gq> yr ieithoedd cymru yn rhoi fy adenydd galon.
<yorick> manveru: I don't have any good reasons for this except ominous warnings "hey you might be thinking about doing nixOS, WHATEVER YOU DO DONT DO NIXOS"
<gq> manveru: :(
<manveru> yorick: too late
<alexgordon> gq: welsh people scare the shit out of me, you'd do well do
<alexgordon> *there
<manveru> yorick: all my base belongs to nixos already :(
<katlogic> manveru: If you mastered their seekret superior language instead, it does not sound that
<katlogic> *bad
<manveru> i wish it was superior
<gq> alexgordon: i yn gwybod rydym yn ei wneud a fi yn mwynhau dychryn chi, ffrind sy'n amharchus iawn.
<manveru> but it's just a lame imitation of lisp
<katlogic> manveru: With unnecesarily overengineered writing script.
<manveru> with fucking semicolons
<manveru> it's freaking 2014 and i still have to write that shit
<katlogic> gq: That almost sounds like legit mongolian.
<manveru> welsh is that language that replaced all vowels with y?
<gq> katlogic: nid yw'n iaith mongolaidd. mae'n yw iaith cymru.
<gq> manveru: ys ;)
* alexgordon wonders how much the new iphone costs
<katlogic> ah, welsh is unrelated to germanic :(
* katlogic thought its just an english accent like scottish, not complete moonspeak like this.
<manveru> alexgordon: too much?
<alexgordon> manveru: most likely
<gq> katlogic: nope. wales is mad.
<katlogic> I've heard rumors they stuffed an iphone into a wristwatch.
<gq> katlogic: you know what they say about irish and scottish being mad? welsh is worse >:)
<gq> it's also one of the official languages of the UK
<gq> if you speak Wales you can apply for citizenship on that basis alone.
<manveru> fucking nfs... how does it even work
<alexgordon> gq: well, of wales :P
<gq> speak welsh*
<alexgordon> gq: welsh speaking wales is like a different place to rest-of-wales
<gq> alexgordon: that doesn't even make sense. you don't make sense.
<katlogic> manveru: I dont think nfs is cloudy enough. Are you sure you dont want to reinvent up some half assed thing in node, with REST, and FUSE, and hookers and blow?
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<alexgordon> gq: I've ever actually BEEN to wales
<alexgordon> :P
<manveru> katlogic: i'm gonna drown you in your own bullshit
<alexgordon> I've been to bristol
<gq> alexgordon: Alex, nad ydych yn gwybod unrhyw beth am i mi neu fy nheulu. Derbyn eich anwybodaeth, os gwelwch yn dda.
<alexgordon> I've _seen_ wales
<gq> alexgordon: what do you want, a prize? i bet your accent is atrocious
<katlogic> manveru: Acquiring initial seeding aint easy.
<alexgordon> gq: my accent is bloody brilliant
<gq> alexgordon: prove it.
<katlogic> manveru: You have to acknowledge your startup brethren for circlejerk to work.
<alexgordon> -nope @ gq
<manveru> seriously though, what possible reason could mount have to wait a whole 30 minutes until it finally says "sorry, i couldn't mount, but i won't even tell you why"
<gq> alexgordon: then i'll continue to think you sound like a Swede speaking Dutch while drunk on French wine.
* gq laughs
<katlogic> manveru: Timeouts. There are options for that, though.
<manveru> yeah, if i controlled the mount command at all
<alexgordon> I sound like a normal person from south west london...
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<katlogic> manveru: :/
<katlogic> manveru: If it gets rst/icmp unreach, it *might* do the right thing.
<katlogic> eg give up early
<gq> alexgordon: i don't believe you :)
<manveru> but it's being executed by vagrant inside virtualbox, which is yet another layer of disgusting indirection :(
<katlogic> Enjoy your cloudification.
<gq> alexgordon: Alex, yr wyf yn meddwl efallai eich bod yn teimlo ychydig yn amddiffynnol heddiw. Ydw i'n gywir?
<katlogic> You've now joined the computing 3.0 borg.
<manveru> :)
* alexgordon lols
<purr> lols
* gq laughs
<katlogic> Seriously though, this stuff is like a fucking headcrab.
* katlogic <= works a happy-go-lucky sunny startup
<manveru> hehe
<katlogic> we have node, elixir, even some vintage ruby stuff
<manveru> as long as you don't have mongodb...
<katlogic> And boy the theatrics of startup incubator events in europe are ridiculous
<katlogic> i mean its just blatant, spasmic copy of techcrunch
<alexgordon> holy shit prince harry is 30?
<katlogic> except for poor plebs
<katlogic> manveru: mongodb is so pre 2010, we have rethingdb and hbase
<manveru> *rethink
<katlogic> yea, whatever is mongo called today
<gq> alexgordon: yes, duh
<manveru> we're on pg and riak atm, so at least a bit of sanity
<katlogic> manveru: best part is, official no hating policy. literally no critique is allowed.
<alexgordon> I can't deal with prince harry being old
<manveru> oO
<katlogic> so you get this sleazy going around issues culture instead everyone afraid to speak up
<manveru> i've never even heard of such a policy
<manveru> that's like... suicide in small doses
<katlogic> manveru: Well, americans are like that kinda by default.
<katlogic> The idea of our boss was to emulate that.
<manveru> the what?
<katlogic> (the fake smile / grandstanding attitude)
<katlogic> manveru: How to describe it, it feels kinda like the mcdonalds in computing.
<manveru> i've been working for american companies for 10 years... nobody tried to bullshit me like that
<katlogic> Wear a small, build some js crap. Be glad to have a job in this economy.
<katlogic> *wear a smile
<gq> alexgordon: i'm 25. 26 next year. time is marching on!
<gq> -alexgordon @ alexgordon
<purr> alexgordon: Could not find `khaleesi`.
<gq> LOL
<purr> LOL
<alexgordon> lol
<alexgordon> gq: nobody has a clue how old I am
<manveru> alexgordon: 29
<gq> alexgordon: ohhhh i had no idea I was talking to the Khaleesi. Can I be your Drogo? Just for the night?
<katlogic> manveru: I suppose you had the luxury of ability to pick employers. Ever been to europe?
<gq> alexgordon: I'll buy you a white mare, Daenerys!
<manveru> katlogic: i live in germany, i'm austrian, so yeah :)
<alexgordon> LOL
<gq> ;)
<katlogic> manveru: Ah :)
<manveru> but i'd never work in europe
<katlogic> manveru: You were suspiciously downer but it never occured to me your could not be american lol.
<manveru> people think "work from home" is an exotic concept
<katlogic> Still is, working in home means you have to do shit.
<katlogic> Naturally I keep shitty day job so I'm free to do whatever I want to do.
<katlogic> Cubicles are made to pretend to work.
<katlogic> (t. was freelancing for 8 years before that, got tired dealing with clients from hell)
<katlogic> manveru: Also, I'm czech, thus naturally born slacker.
<manveru> yeah... i did freelancing for a while
<manveru> but people are insane
<manveru> and enforcing payments across borders is pretty hard
<manveru> brb, hunting some dinner
<joelteon> gq: have i missed anything
<joelteon> alexgordon: didn't you see the picture of MY tits
<alexgordon> joelteon: no
<alexgordon> and I don't want to
<joelteon> oh, ok
<joelteon> no, that's fine
<joelteon> i understand
<gq> joelteon: no
<joelteon> okay
<joelteon> ok, we good?
<gq> no.
<gq> But I do not wish to argue with you anymore, so yes
<gq> We can consider the matter closed.
<joelteon> ok good
<gq> Okay, good.
<joelteon> sorry, had a long lunch
<joelteon> we have a new hire
<joelteon> he's fresh out of stanford
<joelteon> i don't yet know if he's any good at programming yet
<alexgordon> joelteon: did you do fizzbuzz on him?
<joelteon> no he's still getting his machine set up
<joelteon> oh wait he's on his way overl
<joelteon> we'll find out
<joelteon> he has't used a package manager before
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<devyn> ELLIOTTCABLE: I am still present in this plane of existence
<gq> yay!
<gq> -fingernails @ devyn
<purr> devyn: dreeping down my strema
<gq> he
<devyn> lolwut
<purr> lolwut
<gq> *heh
<devyn> why
<gq> idk
<devyn> hahhahaha
<gq> -devyn @ devyn
<purr> devyn: he is so wat right now
<gq> lol
<joelteon> ur mom
<gq> -otters @ joelteon
<purr> joelteon: write-only stream
<gq> -joelteon @ joelteon
<purr> joelteon: Not an otter.
<gq> heh
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<joelteon> i totally am an otter though
<gq> -nuck @ joelteon
<purr> joelteon: shut up nuck you are a nuck
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<nuck> shut up gq >:[
<gq> -mix @ nuck
<purr> nuck: shut up you fuckers i'm awesome and like elliott but better 'cos tits
<nuck> lol
<purr> lol
<nuck> Woah
<nuck> That is a great quote
<nuck> "Your child telling you that they are gay is not the sign that you failed as a parent. You disowning your child is the sing that you failed as a parent"
<joelteon> sing is my favorite pokemon move
<nuck> I thought it'd be something electric since you're a joelteon
<gq> joelteon: really? my favorite is Lick
<nuck> joelteon: >he hasn't used a package manager before
<nuck> Oh god whay
<gq> but then i am a ghost pokemon, Haunter to be specific
<gq> or possibly Arbok
<nuck> How do you get through stanford without ever using a package manager
<gq> nuck: be white
<nuck> You can't even get through my local community college without using a package manager
<joelteon> he's hispanic
<joelteon> shitlord
<gq> joelteon: okay, second guess: be really competent
<nuck> You're required to be able to install gcc at the very least
<gq> and don't call me a shitlord, r/SHITREDDITSAYS banned me for opping a black lesbian, joelteon
<joelteon> he usually does ./configure; make; make install
<nuck> But most configures won't install deps
<nuck> o_o
<joelteon> he installs all the dependencies manually
<nuck> ... you're joking, right?
<joelteon> sure, why not
<nuck> D:
<joelteon> I've never been called skinny in an aggressive way before today
<nuck> twiglet
<gq> nuck: he thinks he's people
<gq> nuck: scroll up and find his picture he claims he has "muscle tits"
* gq cries laughing
<gq> i mean uh
<gq> we weren't starting that fight again
<gq> nvm
<gq> JOELTEON IS A BEAUTIFUL OTTERS AND SOMEDAY HE WILL FIND AN OTTERESS
<joelteon> yeah i don't have rolls of fat :(
<gq> AND THEY WILL MAKE BEAUTIFUL MUSIC TOGETHER
<gq> don't call my tits rolls of fat you fucking useless str8 boi
<gq> ^.^
<nuck> Well they technically are giant fatbags
<joelteon> no, they aren't
<joelteon> on some girls they're connective tissue and breast tissue and fat
<joelteon> on some they are
<nuck> well yeah there's connective tissue and breast tissue but also a *lot* of fat
<nuck> At least in larger sizes
<gq> i'm not interested in showing pix so we can determine how much fatchick my tits make me -.-
<gq> i'm 5'0" with a normal length torso and absurd hobbit size legs
<gq> but since short, very little wiggle room in terms of gaining or losing weight.
<joelteon> you had one SFW earlier right
<gq> i would never post titpix online
<gq> i'm a good girl
<gq> rite nuck
<joelteon> dats why i said sfw
<gq> i would never post pix of myself online
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<gq> do you want rape ants? that's how you get rape ants
<joelteon> ya good point
<nuck> gq: you? good girl? right
<gq> i'm a good girl
<joelteon> you wouldn't
<gq> rite nuck
<gq> i wouldn't.
<gq> clearly that's my sister or some nice gurl
<gq> whose cam i hacked.
* gq nods
<joelteon> well, she could stand to lose a little weight
<joelteon> let her know
<gq> joelteon: i'll tell her some useless twat online said she was gorgeous ^.~
<joelteon> ok
<gq> okay
<devyn> lol jeez
<purr> lol
<alexgordon> devyn!
<devyn> alexgordon!
<alexgordon> save meee
* devyn saves alexgordon
<gq> -nuck @ alexgordon
<purr> alexgordon: shut up nuck you are a nuck
<gq> ^_^
<devyn> -nuck @ gq
<purr> gq: shut up nuck you are a nuck
<devyn> -factoid nuck
<purr> devyn: Popularity: 109, last changed by: devyn, 685ſ 139mſ ago
<devyn> wow that's been around a while
<devyn> nearly 2 years
<gq> mhm
<gq> -gq @ gq
<purr> gq: genderqueer
<gq> lel
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<nuck> devyn: I just keep coming back
<nuck> "Sometimes I feel like my throat is just too small to handle all this shit that comes out of my boss' ass" -- somebody in anotehr channel I'm in
<nuck> I'm not sure what he means but I think he's eating his boss's poop
<gq> he's totally eating his boss out
<nuck> probably
<nuck> This guy has been known to masturbate on the job
<nuck> He works in a call center for cisco
<nuck> Not as a caller himself, but as the guy who handles the tech support calls from the tech support people
<gq> oh
<gq> i used to do tech support for AT&T
<gq> and yeah.
<gq> the less said about that job the better.
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<nuck> I was thinking "oh I'll just order some manga on amazon.co.jp"
<nuck> But holy christballs
<nuck> $30 shipping on $35 manga
<nuck> It's absurd
<gq> lol
<purr> lol
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