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<alexteabaggordon> I am writing the most INSANE piece of code I have ever written
<elliottcable> alexteabaggordon ⑊ so, it's up to my standards?
<alexteabaggordon> elliottcable: it involves asm generation
<alexteabaggordon> elliottcable: I'm not sure you have ever written code this insane
<elliottcable> I doubt that, immensely.
<elliottcable> You've *seen* what I do.
<alexteabaggordon> elliottcable: just wait :D
* elliottcable laughs
<elliottcable> I probably won't be able to understand it, 'cause alexgordoncode.
<elliottcable> Nonetheless. I'm proud of you.
<Nuck> Isn't asm generation what powers JIT compilers?
<alexteabaggordon> Nuck: yeah
<alexteabaggordon> Nuck: I'm writing a JIT countdown solver
<Nuck> Nice
<micahjohnston_> elliottcable:
<micahjohnston_> you can't have left in the last 4 minutes
<alexteabaggordon> I don't even know *why* I'm writing a JIT countdown solver
<alexteabaggordon> it's just really really compelling
<alexteabaggordon> I was inspired by rufus hound breaking eggs with a mallet taped to his penis
<elliottcable> really really *compiling*, don't'ch'a mean?
<micahjohnston_> elliottcable: elliottcable elliottcable elliottcable
<elliottcable> alexgordon: "I was inspired by rufus hound breaking eggs with a mallet taped to his penis" wat.
<purr> beep.
<alexteabaggordon> elliottcable: rufus hound, breaking eggs, with a mallet taped to his penis
<alexteabaggordon> this actually happened
<Nuck> what the fuck
<Nuck> Why is reality gettng as fucked up as our wats?
<alexteabaggordon> it'll be on the internet soon
<alexteabaggordon> elliottcable: https://twitter.com/search?q=rufus%20hound%20eggs&src=typd I am not making this up
<alexteabaggordon> it was glorious if you watch it
<elliottcable> wat
<alexteabaggordon> :D
<elliottcable> who the hell is this wanker
<elliottcable> micahjohnston_ ⑊ hi.
<elliottcable> I'm not here for long. I have every intention of getting drunk tonight.
<elliottcable> in other news, *god* I love tmux.
<alexteabaggordon> elliottcable: comedian
<micahjohnston_> elliottcable: how is relationship shash
<micahjohnston_> I remember that was uncertain
<elliottcable> what?
<elliottcable> micahjohnston_ ⑊ confus™
<micahjohnston_> you were talking about it a couple months ago
<micahjohnston_> just wondering what the outcome was
<elliottcable> talking about what ...
<elliottcable> “relationship hash?”
<micahjohnston_> relationship shit
<elliottcable> oh. Um. I don't remember what was going on months ago.
<micahjohnston_> ok
<elliottcable> but I'm with Chelsea, now; have been for quite a while
<elliottcable> shit's always edxtremely difficult with her, but I also thoroughly love her.
<elliottcable> her best friend hates my guts now, which sucks, because *we* were friends for quite a while.
<elliottcable> Um,,,,,
<elliottcable> ideekay. She's hot. I get laid a lot. She's smart. She talks to me about interesting things. But she's extremely difficult to deal with; I suspect she's Asperger's case or something. She's less socially capable than most of the nerds I know.
<elliottcable> She completely misses subtle social clues from me; and she doesn't understand how things she does or says comes off to myself (and sometimes others).
<elliottcable> I nearly dumped her once, because I got really tired of her hurting me all of the time. We had a big discussion about it at the time, and she's certainly gotten *better* about it, but ...
<elliottcable> anyway.
<micahjohnston_> hmmm ok
<elliottcable> Last weekend, I took her to Vail, Colorado for Valentine's Day.
<micahjohnston_> cool
<elliottcable> She's a hardcore snowboarder chick. Not my kind of thing at all ... I used to ski when I was little, so I tried to pick it back up for this trip, but I fucking suck.
<micahjohnston_> heh
<elliottcable> It ended up being extremely miserable for me. She dragged me over to the back of the mountain or something, and I got stuck on a bunch of double-black-dimond tracks.
<micahjohnston_> I was gonna go snowboarding with my girlfriend last saturday but then things came up
<elliottcable> I fell off a cliff. My boots hurt a lot the whole time. It sucked, in general.
<micahjohnston_> aw
<elliottcable> on the bright side, I had completely forgotten I was an excellent skiier when I was little.
<elliottcable> so it was amazing how much “just came back” after eleven fucking years, as soon as I clipped my boots in.
<alexteabaggordon> this is coming together!
<elliottcable> anyway.
<elliottcable> Bought liquor tonight. Going to be partyin' hard tomorrow night.
<alexteabaggordon> :( I've never been skiing
<elliottcable> Mixing my drinks for the first time in months ... actually, first time since Canada.
<elliottcable> alexteabaggordon ⑊ don't go with someone hardcore.
<elliottcable> alexteabaggordon ⑊ they'll drag you off of cliffs.
<elliottcable> alexteabaggordon ⑊ it will suck.
<elliottcable> >,>
<alexteabaggordon> lol
<purr> lol
<elliottcable> <,<
<micahjohnston_> haha
<alexteabaggordon> ok so
<elliottcable> buuuuuuut, *other than* the snowsports we went there to do, it was an excellent weekend.
<alexteabaggordon> here's what I'm doing
<elliottcable> expensive as all ungodly fuck.
<elliottcable> but worth it.
<alexteabaggordon> I'm generating abstract RPN machines represented by binary numbers
<alexteabaggordon> so a number in the machine is a 1, and an operator is a 0
<elliottcable> 's where I got us rooms.
<alexteabaggordon> so number number operator number operator would be
<alexteabaggordon> ...01011
<prophile> i like
<alexteabaggordon> elliottcable: wow that looks cool
<prophile> how do you say
<prophile> trains
<audy> elliottcable i used to live at a ski resort but my parents never took my skiing
<audy> I suspect because they are fat
<alexteabaggordon> lol
<audy> There was this slide that went down the mountain that you'd ride down in this kart
<audy> occasionally someone would get stuck in the half pipe and 'cause a clog
<audy> cause
<alexteabaggordon> anyway then I'm taking my abstract machines and applying registers to each number, and instructions to each operator, with the stipulation that each register is used only once
<elliottcable> audy ⑊ where was this?
<alexteabaggordon> then I'm going to write all of that to a file
<elliottcable> alexteabaggordon ⑊ yep, it's the largest ski resort in the U.S. ... it was UNGODLY BIG
<audy> elliottcable Jiminy Peak, mass
<elliottcable> It took us three gondolas to get to the top of the first mountain; then we skiied down the *back* of that,
<alexteabaggordon> then mmap it with PROT_EXEC and run the fucking thing!
<alexteabaggordon> what could possibly go wrong
<elliottcable> then up another two lifts to get to the top of the second mountain in the BACK.
<elliottcable> and when I got sick of it and angry and hurting and sad, it took me a solid hour and a half to ski/lift/ski/lift my way all the way back to the resort.
<elliottcable> jesus.
<elliottcable> Colorado, bitch?
<elliottcable> th'fuck of value is in Massateuchetsts.
<elliottcable> other than unspellable names.
<micahjohnston_> we have good skiing/snowboarding here in utah
<micahjohnston_> but i've never actually been :(
<elliottcable> so I hear
<elliottcable> Skiing is cool, if you rent gear
<alexteabaggordon> this one time, right, we got like an inch of snow. It was really cool
<micahjohnston_> haha
<elliottcable> I bought brand-new gear, high-end stuff (100% Intense™)
<elliottcable> but that meant I have a breaking-in period to get through, I guess
<micahjohnston_> mm
<alexteabaggordon> 100% Rich Motherfucker™
<micahjohnston_> if I get into the honors dorms at college
<micahjohnston_> there is a ski wax room
<elliottcable> which translates to “Your boots will repetitively rape your feet in their feet-y-assholes, over and over, for eleven full days of skiing.”
<elliottcable> and alternatively to “You will hate life, god, your girlfriend, and your own body, for eleven days.”
<alexteabaggordon> micahjohnston_: honors dorms ski wax room
<alexteabaggordon> yep this is a sentence I never anticipated hearing
<elliottcable> sounds about right.
<elliottcable> micahjohnston_ ⑊ which college did you decide on? are you in Uni now?
<micahjohnston_> alexteabaggordon: “honors dorms ski wax room” wat.
<purr> beep.
<micahjohnston_> elliottcable: still a senior
<alexteabaggordon> micahjohnston_: you said it!
<micahjohnston_> graduating this yea3r
<micahjohnston_> going to the U
<elliottcable> alexteabaggordon ⑊ it wasn't that much money, honestly
<alexteabaggordon> omg micah is graduating
<micahjohnston_> university of utah
<elliottcable> alexteabaggordon ⑊ it was more just I like doing things right; and I live back in the north now.
<alexteabaggordon> micah isn't 14 any more
<elliottcable> alexteabaggordon ⑊ so having *good* ski-gear to use, so I'll take advantage of the snow up here, is something that needed to happen
<alexteabaggordon> :( I'm old OLD
<elliottcable> alexteabaggordon ⑊ RIGHt!?
<micahjohnston_> girlfriend is going to a different college 2 hours away :(
<alexteabaggordon> micahjohnston_: which one?
<elliottcable> micahjohnston_ ⑊ how serious are you two?
<elliottcable> micahjohnston_ ⑊ protip, dump that bitch.
<elliottcable> micahjohnston_ ⑊ just sayin'.
<elliottcable> micahjohnston_ ⑊ Long distance relationships suck, and this is *Uni*.
<elliottcable> Get drunk, get laid, and write code.
<elliottcable> (Trademark 2013, the Elliottcable School of Lyfe)
<alexteabaggordon> lol
<purr> lol
<alexteabaggordon> OR do what she'll be doing: screw other people regardless!
<micahjohnston_> lol
<micahjohnston_> we weren't very serious until a few weeks ago
<alexteabaggordon> Alex Teabag Gordon School of Lyfe
<micahjohnston_> alexteabaggordon: utah state university
<alexteabaggordon> micahjohnston_: I meant which girlfriend
<micahjohnston_> lolol
<micahjohnston_> the only one
<alexteabaggordon> I lost count
<elliottcable> so it turned serious right before you graduated? that's dumb.
<alexteabaggordon> it's all these "dances"
<elliottcable> you're smarter than that, come on.
<micahjohnston_> well like
<micahjohnston_> she decided not to date anyone for a while after we'd been sort of a thing for a bit
<alexteabaggordon> when the fuck did #elliottcable become #convincemicahtobreakupandscrewlotsofgirlsincollege ?
<micahjohnston_> but then decided it was the wrong decision
<alexteabaggordon> related, I am joining this channel
<elliottcable> .... what lol
<purr> lol
<micahjohnston_> and it's not super-long-distance
<elliottcable> she decided not to date anyone ... after ... um ...
<alexteabaggordon> IT. WON'T. LET. ME.
<elliottcable> can't figure that sentence out.
<micahjohnston_> like
<micahjohnston_> ok
<micahjohnston_> we'd been sort of a thing
<micahjohnston_> for a few months
<micahjohnston_> and then she decided to try not dating anyone for a while
<micahjohnston_> but then decided it was the wrong decision because she missed me etc.
<micahjohnston_> idek
<micahjohnston_> but yeah not like we planned it to be 6 mo before leaving for college
<micahjohnston_> lol
<micahjohnston_> anyway if it doesn't work out long distance we can end it and I can screw girls
<micahjohnston_> but that's not what I want right now
<alexteabaggordon> yes it is
<elliottcable> oh,
<elliottcable> “not dating” as in *not dating you*
<elliottcable> I read that as,
<micahjohnston_> well not dating as in not dating anyone
<elliottcable> you were an open-thing for a while, then she decided to be exclusive with you
<elliottcable> alexteabaggordon ⑊ lololol <3
<micahjohnston_> open-thing for a while, decided not to date anyone, then decided to be exclusive with me
<alexteabaggordon> just saying, screwing girls is better than not screwing girl
<elliottcable> lolgotit
<elliottcable> naaaaah
<elliottcable> the sex isn't the point
<alexteabaggordon> well
<elliottcable> the stress of a long-distance relationship, is the point.
<elliottcable> let me rephrase:
<elliottcable> you can either end it with your highschool crush, on a good note, now.
<alexteabaggordon> sure, but just pointing out that lots of sex is definitely better than no sex
<micahjohnston_> yeah I get the whole thi4ng
<elliottcable> or you can have it devolve into something stressful, and then have it *end badly*, and ruin the memory for you.
<micahjohnston_> I get that
<elliottcable> I find it hard to imagine that alexteabaggordon gets laid.
<micahjohnston_> but it's not like our only contact would be skype
<alexteabaggordon> elliottcable: the feeling is mutual
<micahjohnston_> like right now I have a lot less in-person contact with her than I"d like but it's not stressful
<micahjohnston_> for various reasons
<micahjohnston_> have 0 classes/lunches with her
<micahjohnston_> parents are dumb
<micahjohnston_> can't tell them about it
<elliottcable> that's huuuuuuuugely different, bro
<elliottcable> believe me. have been there.
<micahjohnston_> and don't let me hang out with her really
<micahjohnston_> so basically we text a lot
<alexteabaggordon> lol
<purr> lol
<micahjohnston_> I know it's not the same thing
<micahjohnston_> (I lie about where I am and hang out with her)
<micahjohnston_> but I'm just saying it's not that long distance and neither of us wants to cut it off
<micahjohnston_> we'll talk about it when the time comes
<micahjohnston_> but no reason not to enjoy the 6 months we have
<alexteabaggordon> omg I missed a vital opportunity to post THIS
<elliottcable> wtf alexteabaggordon
<audy> does googlebot index that?
<elliottcable> I hope so.
<alexteabaggordon> :D
<alexteabaggordon> I'm not worried, "alex gordon" currently goes to some famous baseball player
<audy> sports players always squat google :(
<elliottcable> so, here's me, while we were in Vail.
<elliottcable> ignore the fucked-up hand.
<elliottcable> http://ell.io/iWNRD
<elliottcable> Chelsea just sent me that.
<elliottcable> she played with her new camera a lot while we were there, lol
<purr> lol
<micahjohnston_> pretty attractive
<elliottcable> micahjohnston_ ⑊ I'd bang you too <3
<elliottcable> brb soda
<alexteabaggordon> elliottcable: for some reason you remind me of Breivik
<micahjohnston_> elliottcable: <3
<micahjohnston_> lol slightly
<alexteabaggordon> hm or maybe wil shipley
<micahjohnston_> sliiiiightly
<alexteabaggordon> :D
<alexteabaggordon> it's the haircut
<alexteabaggordon> and INCREDIBLY BOX-SHAPED HEAD
<elliottcable> tmux is so sexy.
<alexteabaggordon> Current Topic: taking the piss out of elliottcable's appearance
<Nuck> alexteabaggordon: You can't take the piss out of his appearance. Piss is an integral part of who elliottcable is.
<alexteabaggordon> ahaha
<alexteabaggordon> I have JUST the image for that
<Nuck> elliott getting peed on?
<Nuck> R. Kelly?
* elliottcable eyebrow
<elliottcable> I love my box-shaped head. ;)
<alexteabaggordon> Nuck, elliottcable: http://chocolatapp.com/snaps/australianhobo.png
<elliottcable> australian hobo, what
<elliottcable> you missed some liquor in that photo
<alexteabaggordon> probably
<elliottcable> ... and circled some soda.
<elliottcable> wtf you suck at this
<elliottcable> omg wassherface, the hippie
<elliottcable> I remember her complimenting my musculature.
<elliottcable> One of the only things I remember from my time down there.
<elliottcable> (it's memorable, because I had none.)
<alexteabaggordon> "down there"
<elliottcable> oh my god it's creepy-guy-whose-name-I-never-learned in the middle of those other two guys
<micahjohnston_> alexteabaggordon: I think a dr pepper is circled
<micahjohnston_> that's silly
<alexteabaggordon> dog at the left!
<elliottcable> and then Jared, the fuckbag who conned me, sitting all alone like the creeper he is over to stage-right.
<elliottcable> OH MY GOD DOG OH MY GOD OH MY GOD
<alexteabaggordon> micahjohnston_: I was in a hurry :P
<micahjohnston_> :P
<elliottcable> yeah, Schweppes and Dr. Pepper circled. failure.
<micahjohnston_> I WANT TO BE IN MY OWN HOUSE
<micahjohnston_> A LOT
<elliottcable> micahjohnston_ ⑊ <3
<micahjohnston_> I've gotten good at lying to my parents though
<micahjohnston_> lol
<purr> lol
<alexteabaggordon> micahjohnston_: are you going to disable http at various times during the day?
<micahjohnston_> alexteabaggordon: yeah just for nostalgia
<alexteabaggordon> micahjohnston_: good at lying? become a politician!
<micahjohnston_> lol
<alexteabaggordon> although, the whole "mormon" thing might work against you. I don't know of any successful mormon politicians
<micahjohnston_> yeah being a businessman is a better bet
<micahjohnston_> I can do leveraged buyouts and own hotels with porn channels in them
<micahjohnston_> mormons are good at that
<alexteabaggordon> lol?
<purr> lol
<micahjohnston_> quite a few of my mormon friends have stopped believing in it
<alexteabaggordon> mormon porn?
<micahjohnston_> alexteabaggordon: marriott hotels
<micahjohnston_> no just normal porn
<alexteabaggordon> isn't that breaking like a gold plate or two?
<micahjohnston_> it's funny though because tithing is paid on it
<micahjohnston_> on the profit from pron channels in the hotels
<alexteabaggordon> does anybody actually watch porn in hotels anymore?
<micahjohnston_> lol if you are dumm
<micahjohnston_> mmm
<micahjohnston_> am i rite
<purr> <elliottcable> writing *completely* unabstracted Paws is like pulling teeth. from a tiger. with a dildo.
<alexteabaggordon> now if only marriott hotels could have PROPER FUCKING INTERNET then it would be fine
<elliottcable> lmao
<elliottcable> THAT EXPLAINS
<elliottcable> WHY THE INTERNET SUCKS SO BAD IN HOTELS D:
<elliottcable> OH MY GOD GLASS SHATTERED>
<micahjohnston_> sigrur rooooos
<elliottcable> micahjohnston_ ⑊ try Emancipator.
<micahjohnston_> stars of the liiiiiid
<elliottcable> micahjohnston_ ⑊ do you still Spotify?
<micahjohnston_> ya
<micahjohnston_> elliottcable: ooh I like this
<elliottcable> yep. excellent shit.
<micahjohnston_> hm
<micahjohnston_> a lot more like
<micahjohnston_> precision
<micahjohnston_> than sigur ros
<micahjohnston_> if yknow what i mean
* micahjohnston_ listens to ()
<elliottcable> wat
<micahjohnston_> by sigur ros
<elliottcable> not a fan of sigur ros, really
<elliottcable> shower-time,
<elliottcable> then drunken-time and comforting-anxious-girlfriend-time
<micahjohnston_> aight bye
<elliottcable> bbl, love you all, keep in touch micahjohnston_, and go fucking make fucking things
<micahjohnston_> <3
<micahjohnston_> haha yeah
<micahjohnston_> making a vidjagame right now
<elliottcable> remember: If you're not making things, you don't matter. <3
<micahjohnston_> gonna make tempus and music as soon as I have the time
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<gqbrielle> alexteabaggordon?
<alexteabaggordon> gqbrielle: it reflects my heritage
<gqbrielle> oh, how far the formerly not-nuts-like-eboyjr have fallen
<gqbrielle> is elliottcable actually online? how did your homestuck slash pairing audition go?
<alexteabaggordon> he was online, yes!
<gqbrielle> damn.
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<purr> <sephr> yeah I had to change my opinion so I could disagree with you
<purr> <mix> what's the syntax for adding a quote to purr
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<purr> <elliottcable> hr'd jolfing an O{S
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<purr> <eboy> no one older than 34's name is devin
<Nuck> So, I want to eventually make a case based on this: http://sta.sh/22ehha1ezn42
<purr> <elliottcable> I must be drunk. I've spent the last N hours *styling my debugging output.*
<alexgordon> ari hoenig O_O
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